Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the percentage of the population living in cities in four Asian countries from 1970 to 2020 ,with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Overall , after a quick glance ,it can be clearly seen that the percentage in Malaysia will be the highest by 2040,while Thailand will have the lowest percentage of the population meanwhile ,Indonesia not only starts with the lowest figure of the population by the end of 2040.

To begin with, the percentage of people living in cities in Malaysia is projected to increase from 33% in 1070 to 80% in 2040.The figure for the Philippines population is projected to fluctuate from 30% to55% by 2040. Although Thailand's population is expected to rise gradually from 19% to approximately 45% ,it will have the lowest percentage of the total population. Furthermore , the amount of Indonesia's population stated from 15% and will rise to 35% in 2040.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the topic and include an overview, noting Malaysia’s projected lead and Thailand’s comparatively low level. However, the overview is unclear: “Indonesia not only starts with the lowest figure … by the end of 2040” does not accurately describe the trend, as Indonesia rises to about 64%, the second-highest figure. The account also omits the major rise in Indonesia and gives its 2040 figure as 35%, rather than approximately 64%. Several other figures are inaccurate, including Malaysia’s starting point and Thailand’s 2040 value. The response is also below the required 150 words, limiting the detail and comparisons provided. To improve, report the main trends accurately and compare the countries at key points, especially at the end of the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph with country-specific details. This gives the reader a basic route through the answer. However, progression within the overview is difficult to follow, particularly in “meanwhile, Indonesia not only starts with the lowest figure … by the end of 2040,” where the relationship between the two ideas is unclear. Linking phrases such as “To begin with,” “Although,” and “Furthermore” are used, but some do not clearly express the relationship between the information that follows. The body also lists figures without grouping or comparing the countries systematically. Organise the details into clear comparisons—for example, the strongest increases and the countries with lower urban shares—and use linking words only where their logical function is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing a graph, including “percentage,” “projected to increase,” “fluctuate,” and “rise gradually.” These choices show an attempt to vary the language rather than repeat one verb throughout. However, several expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “after a quick glance,” “the amount of Indonesia’s population,” and “the percentage of the Philippines population.” The phrase “the lowest percentage of the total population” is also repeated without making the comparison precise. There are spelling and typing issues, including “1070” for the year and missing spaces around punctuation, which reduce polish. Aim for accurate collocations such as “urban population share” and “the proportion of people living in cities,” and choose verbs that match the data clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of sentence forms, including a complex sentence beginning “Although Thailand’s population is expected to rise gradually…” and a comparative construction in the overview. The main message is generally understandable, but errors in sentence construction and punctuation sometimes make relationships unclear. For example, “Indonesia not only starts with the lowest figure … by the end of 2040” leaves the “not only” structure incomplete, while “the amount of Indonesia’s population stated from 15%” has an unclear verb pattern. Commas are often separated from the preceding word, and several sentences run ideas together without clear punctuation. Practise building complete comparisons and checking verb forms and sentence boundaries; this will make your range of structures more controlled and easier to follow.

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