Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

I stronglu believe that people should do work no quention in that however, they should spend time with family, childern and sometime they should do activies in thier life. In my opinion, if they spend more time in work, it will have more disadvantages rather than advantages.

People should spend time time in activites like, sports, singing, dancing, watching tv, drama, books, and so on. Whenever they are doing another activity, them brain develove well and also they are more productive rather than who doing work seven out of seven days. Moreover, scientifically proven that, people who spen time 1 hour to 2 hour in other activity like walking, exercising they are more fit. Furthermore, they are suffering from very less medical issues. Example, Oxfod University did a survey, they find that people who are highly do activies along with work, they are very fit and they are more intelligent rather than who guve more important to work.

Many people give priotiy to activites rather than work. Sometimes, they go often participate in different activites, due to that them work divied into other collaegue, and work pressure into them's collaegue. So, thy are in under pressure of work, timeline and sometimes, they are gone in dipression. Furthermore, they are also don't like work because they are mentally extusted.

In conclusion, People should do other activies but keep in mind they should complete them work before go on vacation for activies, or doing other activities. Company should offer once in month or once in a week, do togher activities so company's member internal bond become very stong.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you believe long working hours bring more disadvantages than advantages. You give relevant points about health, productivity, family time, and pressure on colleagues, so the response addresses the topic. However, the discussion is only partly developed. The first body paragraph focuses on the benefits of leisure rather than explaining in detail how long hours harm workers, and the Oxford University survey is mentioned without enough context or a specific finding. The second paragraph shifts to people prioritising activities over work, which does not directly explain the effects of working long hours. Develop each point with a clear cause-and-effect explanation and a relevant, specific example, while keeping the comparison of advantages and disadvantages central.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” help signal movement between points. However, progression is uneven: the second body paragraph moves from leisure activities to colleagues’ workload and depression without clearly connecting these ideas to the main question. Some links are also mechanical or unclear, as in “due to that them work divied into other collaegue.” The conclusion introduces company-organised activities but does not clearly summarise the argument about long hours. Use each paragraph to develop one central point, make references explicit, and connect examples to the claim they support.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “productive,” “medical issues,” “work pressure,” and “mentally exhausted,” and you attempt to discuss health and workplace effects. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand, such as “childern,” “activies,” “priotiy,” and “dipression.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, including “them brain develove well” and “highly do activies.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “work-life balance,” “leisure pursuits,” and “work-related stress” would help express your ideas clearly without relying on repeated general words like “activities” and “work.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including conditional forms such as “if they spend more time in work, it will have more disadvantages” and a relative clause beginning “people who…”. However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences hard to follow. For example, “Moreover, scientifically proven that” lacks a subject and verb, while “they are also don’t like work” combines incompatible verb forms. Agreement and sentence construction are also problematic in “them work divied into other collaegue.” Practise building complete clauses with a clear subject and correctly formed verb, then check agreement, articles, and punctuation. Greater control of these basics will make your ideas easier to understand.

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