Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.
Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
A significant amount of people are working longer hours to become wealthy but leaving very little time for leisure activities such as watching movies or to have dinner. Some people believe that this kind of daily routine helps them become wealthier. Whereas others argue that working for longer hours leads to weaken relationships and increase stress levels in the individuals. I personally believe that working more than enough has more disadvantages than its advantages.
To begin with, some people believe that money is the most important key to success. Therefore, they tend to work for longer hours. An overtime makes a huge impact on person's salary, in which he can fulfil his goals of buying an expensive house or a luxury car. Moreover, having a good bank balance makes an individual confident and it also earns respect to a certain extent. Some people believe that an individual is always judged on his bank balance. Therefore, maintaining a good bank balance helps person to stand out among others.
On the other hand, others argue that, people who spend more time in their professional lives tend to have less amount of time for the leisure activities. For example, when an individual spends too much time in earning, he will spend less time with his family and friends. This could result in maintaining weak relationship bonds with the family and friends. Additionally, working too much also impact on person's physical and mental health. It means, People who work more than usual hours tend to have health problems such as pain and strains. Whereas, it also disturbs one's mental health.
In conclusion, despite the fact that working more will make an individual wealthy, I believe people should manage their professional lives along with some other activities such as spending time with their families and friends by taking them on the dinner.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, clearly stating a position that the disadvantages of working long hours outweigh the advantages. The ideas are relevant, covering financial gain on one side and health/relationship impacts on the other. However, the development is somewhat limited; for instance, the argument regarding financial success is a bit repetitive, focusing heavily on 'bank balance' rather than exploring broader career progression or professional satisfaction. To reach a higher band, you should aim to provide more nuanced examples or deeper analysis of the consequences mentioned, such as the long-term societal impact of work-life imbalance, rather than just listing common points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the two sides of the argument. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader through the text. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing and flow, such as the slightly awkward phrasing in the transition between the second and third paragraphs. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow throughout the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'professional lives', 'leisure activities', and 'mental health'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'an overtime makes a huge impact' (should be 'working overtime') and 'earns respect to a certain extent'. The repetition of phrases like 'bank balance' and 'working for longer hours' limits the range of vocabulary. To improve, try to incorporate more varied synonyms and collocations related to the workplace and lifestyle.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'A significant amount of people' (should be 'number of'), 'leads to weaken' (should be 'leads to weakened'), and 'it also impact on person's physical' (should be 'impacts a person's'). Articles are also missing or misused in several places, such as 'in which he can fulfil his goals' and 'by taking them on the dinner'. These errors do not impede communication, but they indicate a need for more careful proofreading of basic subject-verb agreement and article usage.
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