Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Due to hectic work schedule people get do not get sufficient time to perform recreational activities. In my opinion, this trend has enormous drawbacks despite few advantages.

Firstly, the most prominent impact of working long hours on individuals health. When they sit infront of computer screens to complete the assigned work, then it not only put negative effect on their eye sight but they also suffer from back problems. Due to sitting on one place for long hours. Apart from this, they also suffer from mental illness. for instance, the recent survey is conducted by world health organization which states that the most significant cause of stress and anxiety among population is long working hours who do not give time to perform physical activities. As a result, which further effect their productivity when they cannot concentrate on work due to stress and anxiety.

Additionally, family relationships get disturb when people remain busy in their work and do not give attention towards their family commitments. The major causative factor, escalating the rate of divorces among society is lack of interaction between partner. children relations are not develop as strong with their parents when if they do not provide quality of time to their children due to hectic work schedule.

However, the chances of promotion are increased when employees work for long period of time especially when somebody calling they cover their work and working during holiday to complete the assignments since employer always award to those employees who work diligently during challenging time. consequently, employees get promoted to higher position who work longer hours to fulfil the company goals.

In conclusion although, physical health and family relationships are disturbed due to longer working hours but employees get work benefits to work for more hours beside giving time to their leisure activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, clearly stating a position that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. The ideas are relevant, covering health, family, and career progression. However, the development is somewhat uneven. While the health and family points are supported with examples, the explanation of the 'advantages' is less detailed and relies on generalisations. To reach a higher band, ensure that the counter-argument is balanced with the same level of depth as the main arguments. The conclusion is a bit repetitive and could be used to better synthesise the main points rather than just restating them.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organised into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'Additionally', and 'However', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or misused, such as 'As a result, which further effect their productivity', where the relative pronoun 'which' creates a fragment. Additionally, some sentences within paragraphs lack smooth flow due to grammatical errors. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different aspects of the argument, which provides a clear structure to the overall response.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'recreational activities', 'causative factor', and 'diligently'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'family relationships get disturb' (disturbed) and 'children relations are not develop' (developed). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of the writing. Expanding the range of collocations and refining word forms would help improve the score in this criterion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there is a high frequency of grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly with verb forms, subject-verb agreement, and sentence fragments. For example, 'the recent survey is conducted' should be 'a recent survey was conducted', and 'the most prominent impact of working long hours on individuals health' is a sentence fragment missing a main verb. While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors indicate a lack of control over complex structures, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band.

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