Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's world, every human being spends a major portion of everyday life at workplace doing work related activities. However, sometimes people prefer to extend their work duration per day to grow up in their career or to earn more money without sparing barely anytime for doing non related activities. But, this phenomenon affects them with lot of side effects relating to their physical and mental health which I'll explain as follow

To start with demerits of working longer than standard, there are many. First of all, because of this, people do not have time to do so things which help them to get a relief from work related stress. For example, after work, if individuals spend some time in doing exercise say like yoga, swimming, walking, playing any physical sports, it help them greatly to recover from mental and physical tiredness from all day work.

Secondly, when people are mostly at work doing long shifts, they do not have any time left to spend with their family like spouses and children. In future, this affects their familial relationships very bad. When a person spends time with its family, it make him/her more stronger emotionally and set him free from mental illness. For example, playing with own children, having dinner with spouse or whole family are great leisure activities to do after work to properly nurture any relationship.

Furthermore, in most developed countries, most people work for average 8 hours. Its not because they do not want money, its because they want to keep them healthy for their long term life. Working more than usual brings many health problems like back pain, less sleep at night, change in behaviour and more.

At last, having enough time after work for doing something that helps to free a person from all day stress and tiredness is really really important. If we keep our body both mentally and physically fit, only then we can enjoy the real nature and thrill of life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the disadvantages of working long hours. However, it fails to provide a balanced view or a clear position on whether there are 'more' advantages or disadvantages, as the essay focuses almost exclusively on the negative aspects. While the ideas are relevant, the development is somewhat repetitive, particularly regarding the impact on family and health. To reach a higher band, you should explicitly acknowledge potential advantages (such as career progression or financial stability) before refuting them or explaining why the disadvantages outweigh them, ensuring a more comprehensive and nuanced argument throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'To start with', 'Secondly', and 'Furthermore' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as 'its' instead of 'it is' or 'their' in contexts where the antecedent is unclear. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points, but the overall progression could be smoother if you used a wider variety of linking words and improved the logical connection between the introduction and the body paragraphs.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'leisure activities', 'familial relationships', and 'mental illness'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'grow up in their career' (instead of 'advance') and 'do so things' (instead of 'do things'). There is also a tendency to repeat simple intensifiers like 'really really'. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and a broader range of academic vocabulary to express complex ideas more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('it help them', 'it make him/her'), article usage ('at workplace'), and punctuation. Some sentences are slightly disjointed due to these errors. While you attempt complex structures, they are not always error-free. To achieve a higher score, focus on proofreading for basic errors like pluralization and verb endings, and try to incorporate more varied complex sentence forms with greater accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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