Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It has been noticed that several individuals do not take enough time for recreational activities due to overtime work. In my perception the drawbacks surpass the benefits because it adversely affects to people's creativity and their over all well-beings.

The foremost detrimental effect is that it creates stress and anxiety. Continuous work for long hours caused tiredness and mental stress. The human minds needs breaks after certain time of work. The mind required to do some interesting and relaxing activities like pursuing hubbies, activities which make mind calm. Constant job work without relaxation make people more isolated, short tempered, and exhausted. As a result, individuals become victims of numerous disease such as obesity, migraine, depression etc. For instance, it has been observed that most of corporate workers suffer from migraine and low eyesight due to over screentime. Consequently, it is detrimental for people's health and mind.

Another one is that it reduces a person's productivity and creativity. It has been noticed that people who follow their interest and hobbies are performed well and become more productive in compare to individuals

can continuously work with very little leisure time. Recreational activities creates new ideas and thoughts. It derives motivation, pleasure and satisfaction. A person can do his/her work more efficiently when he/she engage himself/herself in leisure activities. For example, Nowadays companys organtize many evenots in their work place to enhance employees work quality and creativity.

However, The downside not to be disregarded: More time dedicate to occupation is increase financial stability, provide luxury and convinience, But it has more disadvantages them benefits.

To conclude, Although prioritized job work is essential because it provides several benefits to life, it has more detrimental effects them favorable. It creates mind lach, enxiety, reduces productivity and creativity also eased many illnesses. In such manner it's disadvantages are outweighed advantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the disadvantages of working long hours outweigh the advantages. The main ideas—stress, health issues, and reduced productivity—are relevant and supported with examples. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The paragraph discussing the advantages is underdeveloped and contains a sentence fragment, which limits the depth of the argument. While the position is consistent throughout, the explanation of why the disadvantages are more significant could be more nuanced to reach a higher band. Overall, the task is addressed, but the supporting arguments lack the depth required for a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'The foremost detrimental effect,' 'Another one is,' and 'To conclude,' which help guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Another one is that it reduces.' Additionally, there are instances where the flow is interrupted by grammatical errors, such as the incomplete sentence in the second paragraph. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but the transition between the advantages and the conclusion could be smoother to improve the overall progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'recreational activities,' 'financial stability,' and 'productivity.' However, there are several instances of incorrect word choice and spelling errors, such as 'hubbies' (hobbies), 'organtize' (organize), 'evenots' (events), and 'mind lach' (likely meant as mental fatigue). These errors do not prevent understanding, but they indicate a limited range and a lack of precision. To improve, the student should focus on accurate spelling and more natural collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there is a high frequency of grammatical errors. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('The human minds needs'), incorrect verb forms ('The mind required to do'), and prepositional errors ('affects to people's'). There are also punctuation issues and sentence fragments, such as the incomplete sentence starting with 'It has been noticed that people who follow their interest and hobbies are performed well and become more productive in compare to individuals can continuously work...'. These errors are frequent and occasionally require the reader to re-read to grasp the intended meaning.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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