Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It has been noticed that several individuals do not take enough time for recreational activities due to overtime work. In my perception the drawbacks surpass the benefits because it adversely affects to people's creativity and their over all well-beings.

The foremost detrimental effect is that it creates stress and anxiety. Continuous work for long hours caused tiredness and mental stress. The human minds needs breaks after certain time of work. The mind required to do some interesting and relaxing activities like pursuing hobbies, activities which make mind calm. Constant doing work without relaxation make people more isolated, short tempered, and exhausted. As a result, individuals become victims of numerous disease such as obesity, migraine, depression etc. For instance, it has been observed that most of corporate workers are suffering from migraine and low eyesight due to over screetime . Consequently, it is detrimental for people's health and mind.

Another adverse effect is that it reduces a person's productivity and creativity. It has been noticed that people who follow their interest and hobbies are performed well and become more productive in compare to individuals

who continuously work with very little leisure time. Recreational activities creates new ideas and thoughts. It derives motivation, pleasure and satisfaction. A person can do his/her work more efficiently when he/she engage himself/herself in leisure activities. For example, Nowadays companys organize many evenets in their work place to enhance employees work quality and creativity.

However, The downside not to be disregarded. More time dedicated to occupation is can increase financial stability, provide luxury and convinience, But it has more disadvantages than benefits.

To conclude, Although prioritized job work is essential because it provides several benefits to life, it has more detrimental effects than favorable. It creates mind load, enxiety, reduces productivity and creativity also coused many illnesses. In such manner it's disadvantages are outweight advantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. The main ideas—health impacts and reduced productivity—are relevant and supported with examples, such as corporate workers suffering from migraines. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The paragraph discussing the advantages is very brief and lacks depth, and the conclusion introduces a slightly confusing structure by mentioning the benefits again. To reach a higher band, ensure that the counter-argument is explored with as much detail as the main argument, and avoid repetitive phrasing in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'The foremost detrimental effect,' 'Another adverse effect,' and 'To conclude,' which help guide the reader. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by mechanical errors and some awkward transitions. For example, the sentence 'However, The downside not to be disregarded' is grammatically incomplete and disrupts the logical progression. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the incomplete sentence ending in 'individuals' at the end of the second paragraph. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'recreational activities,' 'financial stability,' and 'productivity.' However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'mind load,' 'over screetime,' and 'prioritized job work.' Some words are used incorrectly, such as 'coused' (caused) and 'enxiety' (anxiety). To improve, focus on learning common collocations and ensuring accurate spelling of key terms to avoid impeding the reader's understanding.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there is a high frequency of grammatical errors. Frequent issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'The human minds needs,' 'Recreational activities creates'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'are performed well'), and missing articles or prepositions (e.g., 'adversely affects to people's'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors indicate a lack of control over complex structures. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that verb tenses are used consistently throughout the essay.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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