Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Presently, a group of people primarily focus on working long hours instead of spending some time on leisure activities like playing sports, listening to music or pursuing their hobbies. These phenomena has its own benefits and consequences.

On one side, some people promotes work over extra curricular activities, as it provides an opportunity to focus on work goals, deadlines, achieving big projects and results leads to promotion or workplace privileges. These workaholics feel spending excess time to those tasks will distract them from their aim and they will loose the track. Additionally, long work schedules provide extra time to finish more and more tasks, which means higher salaries. However, impairing health conditions and missing an opportunity to spare time with family cannot be negotiated.

On the other side, constantly working long hours does not only impacts mental health it also affects the physical health. Moreover, working sitting jobs for longer time leads to sore back and worsened eyesight for sitting for long hours on the same position and not having any physical activities. Furthermore, these conditions of not being able to take rest or spending time with near ones creates an issues such as anxiety and depression. Consequently, spending a time with family plays an essential role to build a happy family where children needs companionship and parents needs a care from them, spouse needs a partner to share their feelings and maintain harmony in the house.

In conclusion, even though working long hours can be beneficial to one for career development and lucrative income, sacrificing family bonding time, health time is not worthwhile loosing in life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of working long hours. You have a clear position that the disadvantages outweigh the benefits. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you provide reasons for both sides, the explanation of the 'advantages' is slightly repetitive, and the 'disadvantages' section could benefit from more specific examples beyond general health issues. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully extended with a clear link back to the prompt's core question regarding whether the situation is overall positive or negative.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use cohesive devices such as 'On one side', 'Additionally', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are instances where the flow between sentences could be smoother. For example, the transition between the discussion of health and the importance of family in the third paragraph is a bit abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that referencing is precise will help elevate the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'lucrative income', 'career development', and 'extra curricular activities'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'working sitting jobs' (should be 'sedentary jobs') and 'loosing in life' (should be 'losing'). There is also some repetition of basic phrases like 'long hours' and 'spending time'. To improve, try to incorporate more precise synonyms and collocations to express your ideas with greater sophistication and clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('These phenomena has', 'some people promotes', 'children needs') and awkward phrasing ('for sitting for long hours on the same position'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are missing commas in complex sentences. To improve, focus on mastering subject-verb agreement and refining your use of prepositions and articles, which will help increase the number of error-free sentences.

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