Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

IN TODAY'S WORLD, EVERYONE IS RUSHING TO FULFILL THEIR DREAMS, THAT IS WHY IT IS OFTEN ARGUED THAT PEOPLE DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH TIME FOR THEIR LEIZURE ACTIVITIES. ALTHOUGH THIS TREND GIVES THEM FINANCIAL STABALIZATION, IT IS AFFECTING THEIR MENTAL HEALTH AS WELL. SO THE DISADVANTAGE WILL CLEARLY ECLIPSE ITS PROS.

THERE ARE VARIOUS REASONS THAT SUPPORT MY OPINION, AND THE PREDOMINANT ONE IS MENTAL HEALTH . PEOPLE WHO DO NOT GET TIME FOR RELAXATION HAS DETRIMENTAL AFFECT ON THEIR PHYSICAL AS WELL AS MENTAL HEALTH WHICH CAN LEAD TO DISEASES LIKE ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION. ALONG WITH THAT, IT ALSO CAUSE EXHAUSATION, WHICH WILL FURTHER EFFECT THE PRODUCTIVITY OF WORK AT WORKPLACE. IT CAN ALSO CAUSE PROBLEMS SUCH AS UNCOOPERATIVE BEHAVIOUR TOWARDS COLLEGUES AND SENIORS DEPLOYING THEIR RELATIONS.

IN ADDITION TO THAT, IT WILL ALSO AFFECT THEIR PERSONAL AND FAMILY RELATIONS. PEOPLE GENERALLY TRY TO OFFEND THE INFERIORS SUCH AS WIFE AND CHILDREN AFTER COMING BACK TO HOME. IT CAN LEAD TO NON HARMMONIOUS FAMILY ENVIRONMENT CONSISTS OF QUARRELS BETWEEN THEM. THESE SITUATIONS ALSO AFFECT THE STUDIES OF CHILDREN AT HOME, AS CHILDREN WILL FIND IT DIFFICULT TO CONCENTRATE ON THEIR STUDIES DUE TO THESE SITUATIONS. THAT IS WHY IT IS CONSIDERED AS A REPURCUSSION TO SELF, FAMILY, AND SOCIETY.

TO CONCLUDE, I WOULD LIKE TO RE-ITERATE THAT HAVING LESS TIME FOR LEIZURE ACTIVITIES SUCH AS PLAY, YOGA, AND SPENDING TIME WITH CLOSE ONES CAN AFFECT A PERSONAL PHYSICALLY AND M,ENTALLY, WHICH WHICH FURTHER CAUSE ISSUES IN THEIR PERSONAL AS WELL AS PROFESSIONAL LIFE.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the disadvantages of working long hours outweigh the advantages. The main ideas—mental health, productivity, and family relationships—are relevant. However, the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the claim that people 'try to offend the inferiors' is an over-generalization and lacks logical support, making the argument feel slightly forced. To reach a higher band, you should provide more nuanced examples and ensure that your supporting points directly follow from the main topic sentences without relying on extreme or illogical claims.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition to that' and 'To conclude' to link your thoughts. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where the flow is interrupted by awkward phrasing, such as 'deploying their relations' or 'consists of quarrels'. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, including terms like 'detrimental', 'repercussion', and 'productivity'. However, there are several spelling errors ('LEIZURE', 'STABALIZATION', 'AFFECT' instead of 'effect', 'COLLEGUES', 'HARMMONIOUS') and word choice issues ('deploying their relations', 'offend the inferiors'). These errors are noticeable and occasionally impede the reader's understanding. To improve, focus on mastering the spelling of common academic vocabulary and ensure that words are used in their correct collocations rather than just choosing synonyms that do not quite fit the context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, they are frequently marred by grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('People who do not get time... has detrimental affect') and incorrect word forms ('it also cause exhausation'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some awkward phrasing choices that affect clarity. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles and prepositions. Proofreading for basic grammatical slips will help ensure that your complex structures are accurate and do not distract from your message.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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