Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.
Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
We are listening a quote, a healthy bodies have a healthy minds. With the passage of time, we all are busy or cannot give a extra time to our body. I completely agree with this . I will give more example below to support my opinion.
With the advancement we used screen or other online methods for doing a job. The teconologies escalate the our physical work. Owing to we have not need to do hard work or other activities. For instance,when a person do whole day work in an office or he feels fatigue on evening. However, he cannot give work to other leisure activities such as playing a game or gym. All these things make a man ill, cause depression or anxiety.
Unfortunately, Some individual think that.We should hard work. Even,when we have spare time. There are many benefits. According to them, it prevent from overthinking or other unknown creative thinking.
From my perspective,it situation will more dangerous for a person who has already weak in physical health. I think balance is most important for healthy life. We should must spent spare time for physical activities such as, taking exercise daily in morning or taking gym at evening.It will boosts our body.
IN conclusion, all the busy working moments are source of irritating as well as depressed thinking. The mind will feel unpleasant by the same thing. We must choose a time for relaxing it from the working burden. For the best performance of a body has to need a healthy mind or fresh blood. We should give maximum time to our body for relaxing.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the disadvantages of working long hours, though it lacks a balanced exploration of potential advantages. The position is clear, but the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument that long hours lead to illness is relevant, but the explanation is hampered by unclear phrasing and limited supporting evidence. The response touches on the counter-argument regarding hard work, but it is not fully developed. To improve, ensure that both sides of the argument are explored with more depth and that the connection between the points and the main thesis is more explicit.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression of ideas is often interrupted by awkward transitions and unclear sentence relationships. While some cohesive devices are used, such as 'However' and 'In conclusion', they are sometimes used incorrectly or in a way that does not effectively link the ideas. The referencing is occasionally ambiguous, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of the argument. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would significantly enhance the coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive, which restricts the ability to convey complex ideas precisely. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'give a extra time to our body' instead of 'devote time to our health' and 'escalate the our physical work'. Some terms are used incorrectly, such as 'irritating' to describe a moment rather than a feeling. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning collocations and using a wider variety of topic-specific vocabulary to express your ideas more naturally and accurately.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('a healthy bodies have a healthy minds'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack proper syntax, which occasionally impedes communication. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are often faulty, such as 'Owing to we have not need to do hard work'. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of prepositions and articles before attempting more complex grammatical forms.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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