Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.
Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this cutting-edge era, working long hours have sparked considerable discussion. Some individuals work more time, leaving very less time for spare activities. It has more disadvantages as compare to advantages. I will discuss my view points in the following paragraphs.
To commence with, although there are numerous demerits behind this trend but first and foremost is anxiety. When human beings work more hours, they feel a sense of depression which lead bad impact on their body. To illustrate , a survey conducted by China in 2019 revealed that 90 percent of people suffered from depression due to overwork. Thus, their nature become angry.
Last but not least, enjoy life with family. To elaborate it, if masses always involve in work, they do not get time to spend with their family . Therefore, bond between them will be not very strong. Their parents along with children do not share their views with them . For example, a newspaper of Mexico stated that family bonding become weak when one person always involve in work and can’t give time to their family. As a result, their children do not take their parents words seriously .
In conclusion , even though there are ample of demerits of overtime work such as sense of depression as well as weak interaction with family.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which limits the depth of the arguments. While the ideas regarding anxiety and family bonding are relevant, they are not fully developed. The conclusion is also incomplete, as it merely restates the points without providing a final summary or closing thought. To improve, you must expand your supporting points with more detailed analysis and ensure the essay meets the minimum word count to allow for a comprehensive discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression. You use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with' and 'Last but not least', though these are sometimes used mechanically. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between the survey and the conclusion of that paragraph is abrupt. Paragraphing is present, but the final paragraph is incomplete, which disrupts the overall structure. Improving the flow between sentences and ensuring each paragraph has a fully developed concluding sentence would enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You use some repetitive phrasing, such as 'work more hours' and 'give time to their family'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'demerits behind this trend' and 'nature become angry'. While the meaning is clear, the range of vocabulary is limited, and there is little evidence of less common lexical items or idiomatic language. To improve, try to incorporate more varied synonyms and focus on natural collocations rather than literal translations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
There is a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but the essay contains frequent grammatical errors. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('working long hours have', 'nature become angry', 'bonding become weak') and incorrect article usage or prepositional phrases ('as compare to', 'a newspaper of Mexico'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are persistent throughout the text. To reach a higher band, you should focus on subject-verb agreement, consistent verb tense usage, and refining your control over complex sentence structures to ensure they are error-free.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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