Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is undeniably true that job is the identity of the human. Owing to this, a large number of human believe that in these days, due to working long hours more and more people do not get enough time to do outdoor activities. This aspect may impact on their health. However, working overtime also leads to luxurious life. This phenomenon has advantages but also has more disadvantages which will be elaborated in subsequent segments.

Commencing with the first and foremost pros of this trend. How longs hours work give more benefits. To be more precise, in order to bear all the expenses, number of individuals try to work more than regular hours that give them double pay. This way help them in covering all household expenditures. Also by working long hours they can cater their family and their own need. Even, if people working do long time work they can avails best education to their children that makes their future secure.

Moving to the paradoxical side, the first demerits of this notion is, if people do work more than 8 or 10 hours. This may impact on their health. Due to lacks in sleep it would be difficult for them to concentrate on their job, which reduce the work progress. Also, these kind of health issue may causes the serious diseases such as cancer, obesity. Which ruins their life. In addition, working long hours reduce the bondings with the family too. if people spend their whole time at work they cannot spend time with their family or kith and kins. This result in break up or misunderstanding.

In conclusion, by analyzing the aforementioned domains it is evident that no doubt working more hours assist to earn better. However, health is wealth if people only focus on earning or saving than to be focused on their health may tangle to divergent kind of health problems.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of working long hours. The position is clear from the introduction, and the main ideas are relevant. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding 'luxurious life' is mentioned but not fully explored, and the points about health and family are somewhat repetitive. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific examples or deeper analysis of the consequences mentioned. The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, but ensure that your main body paragraphs provide a more balanced and detailed exploration of the topic to fully satisfy the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'Commencing with', 'Moving to', and 'In conclusion', to guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as the sentence fragment 'How longs hours work give more benefits.' Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence connects logically to the previous one will help improve the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You attempt to use some less common vocabulary, such as 'paradoxical' and 'expenditures', though there are instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'job is the identity of the human' and 'cater their family'. Some phrasing is also repetitive, particularly regarding the discussion of health. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and ensure that your word choices are appropriate for a formal essay context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('number of individuals try', 'these kind of health issue may causes') and punctuation errors. Some sentences are also grammatically incomplete or awkward, such as 'if people only focus on earning or saving than to be focused on their health may tangle to divergent kind of health problems.' These errors do not generally impede communication, but they are noticeable and occur throughout the text. Increasing your control over basic grammar and sentence construction is essential for a higher score.

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