Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In this fast growing world, people barely get time for their leisure activities. It is undeniable fact that, in order to improve physical and mental strength individulas need to take break from their work schedule. To my mind, I firmly believe that, working longer hours and avoiding leisure activities have more drawbacks ought to the benefits.

First and foremost, nowadays people are living in cut-throght competition in order to prove their superiority, for them physical and mental fitness become the most inevitable part of the life. For example, if someone have the desk job and they had to be sitting more then 10 to 12 hours in a day then the person may have suffer from the back pain. In order to curb this, they need to spend some time for leisure activities such as walking and straching.

In addition,in order to reduce the stress in individuals lives they need to give some time for the leisure activity. It is scintifically proven that, on an average day if people go to the gym then they improve their physical fitness.

In conclusion, after analyzing above arguments it is crystal clear that

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You take a clear position that long working hours and limited leisure have more disadvantages, and your points about back pain and stress are relevant to the question. However, the response addresses the task only partially: the effects are asserted rather than explained in depth, and the gym example does not clearly show how long hours create a disadvantage. The conclusion is unfinished (“it is crystal clear that”), so your final judgement is not completed. The response also contains 190 words, below the required 250, leaving too little space to develop your reasoning and examples. To strengthen the response, explain the consequences of reduced leisure for health, relationships, or productivity, and complete the conclusion by restating your position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs, and an attempted conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “First and foremost” and “In addition” help signal the points, and the reader can generally follow the movement from physical health to stress. However, progression is limited because the second body paragraph gives only one brief claim, while the conclusion stops mid-sentence. Some linking is mechanical, and the relationship between the gym example and the argument about long working hours is not made explicit. Develop each paragraph around one clear point, connect examples directly to that point, and use a complete concluding paragraph to bring the argument together.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt some topic-appropriate vocabulary, including “leisure activities,” “physical and mental fitness,” “competition,” and “reduce the stress.” These choices show an effort to discuss health and work rather than relying entirely on basic language. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate spellings or word combinations distract the reader, such as “cut-throght competition,” “individulas,” “straching,” and “scintifically proven.” Some phrases are also unnatural, including “prove their superiority” and “the most inevitable part of the life.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “work-related stress” and “sedentary work” would help express your ideas clearly and efficiently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple statements and attempts at longer sentences, including a conditional example beginning “if someone have the desk job.” This shows some effort to vary sentence structure, but complex constructions are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make parts difficult to read. For example, “someone have” needs subject–verb agreement, while “they had to be sitting” shifts tense awkwardly within a general example. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “It is undeniable fact that” and the comma after “In addition.” The final sentence is incomplete. Practise building accurate conditional sentences and checking agreement, articles, tense consistency, and punctuation before adding further complexity.

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