Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Over the last century, businesses and working industry have seen exponential growth and a person works more than average and get a small for personal interests or hobbies. I believe that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages which I will discuss in the upcoming paragraphs with relative examples.

There are several potential benefits to working longer hours. Firstly, people can make huge earning figures and become more stable financial wise. This can allow people to spend on good education for themselves or family, also can invest more, for example they can buy assets, houses and even invest in shares, within few years with help of these they can create income sources from these assets. Therefore working more hours can benefit individulals to build financial and lifestyle status.

However, I believe that the drawbacks are considerably more significant. The main disadvantage is that unhealty lifestyle can contribute to several health and mental problem. As people do not balance their work and health, often problems can be seen such as anxiety, depression and a bad posture due to high workloads. Because, if a person is not following a balanced diet and workout plan or activity, the body starts experiencing in poor sleep and matabolism. Another major impact is poor relationships with family, becuase individuals who work late hours are less likely to attend any events, festivals with their family members. Consequently, they encounter stress in relationships, especially in martitial status.

To conclude, although working long hours can provide ecnomical growth and stable financial conditions, also can achieve desired career opportunities, I believe that the disadvantages are greater. In particular, the negative effects on their health, family life and personal interests are not deniable.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear from the introduction—“the disadvantages outweigh the advantages”—and remains consistent in the conclusion. You address both sides of the question: the benefits paragraph explains how higher earnings may support education, investment and asset ownership, while the drawbacks paragraph discusses health and family relationships. These relevant points are extended with examples, such as anxiety and missing family events, which supports a developed response. To strengthen the argument further, explain the links between long hours and these outcomes more precisely, and avoid broad claims such as “people can make huge earning figures” without qualification. The conclusion could also synthesise the comparison more directly, rather than mainly repeating the disadvantages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, a contrasting paragraph on disadvantages, and a conclusion. The progression is easy to follow, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “However,” “Another major impact,” and “To conclude” help show how the ideas relate. The health and family points are also separated clearly within the main discussion. At times, however, connections between sentences feel mechanical or unclear. For example, “Because, if a person…” does not attach smoothly to the preceding sentence, and “also can invest more” has an unclear subject. Use linking phrases selectively and make references explicit so the reader can follow the cause-and-effect relationships without having to infer them.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “financial conditions,” “work-life” ideas such as “workloads,” and terms like “anxiety,” “depression,” and “income sources.” This gives you enough language to communicate the main argument. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “working industry,” “make huge earning figures,” “financial wise,” and “stable financial conditions” do not sound idiomatic in context. Spelling errors such as “unhealty,” “individulals,” “becuase,” and “martitial” are also noticeable. Build a bank of natural collocations for work, income and wellbeing, and proofread spelling and word forms. More accurate phrasing would make your ideas clearer and more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including cause-and-effect structures such as “Because, if a person…” and a concession in the conclusion beginning “although.” This shows an effort to vary sentence forms. However, complex constructions are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms and sentence boundaries recur. For instance, “a person works more than average and get” shifts from singular to plural agreement, while “a small for personal interests” is incomplete and difficult to interpret. The sentence beginning “Because” is also not correctly connected to the previous sentence. Practise building complete clauses and checking subject–verb agreement, articles and punctuation; shorter, accurate sentences would help you express the argument more reliably.

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