Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

People hardly have time for their hobbies, because they have long working hours. This trend has detremental impact on individual's well-being and creative thinking.

Health related issue is one of the major downsides, if people work for extra time they left with no or little time for exercise, sports or biking. Take gym, for example, when individuals do not have extra time they often refuse to join gym, because it requires at least one hour of exercising. This ultimately effect on their health as they reduce the hours of exercising.

People creative thinking is aslo Latest working patterens changing the life styles of people as

reduce the thinking ability is another facot assocciated to . Less

Thus, it is clear that

In conclusion, professionals who work prolong hours often left with few hours for leisure activities, which not only have detrimental effect on thier health but also reduce their ability to think diffenently.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You take a relevant position by stating that long working hours harm well-being and creative thinking, and you develop one clear disadvantage: reduced time for exercise, illustrated with the gym example. However, the response addresses the question only partially. The second main point about creative thinking is left unfinished, and the conclusion repeats the health point without explaining or supporting the creativity claim. The task asks you to compare advantages and disadvantages and decide which predominates; your position implies that disadvantages are greater, but this judgement is not fully explained. The response also falls short of the required 250 words. Develop both reasons with specific consequences or examples, and make the comparison explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The opening introduces the topic, and the paragraph about health has a recognisable main idea followed by an example. The conclusion also signals an ending. However, the overall progression is disrupted because the paragraph beginning “People creative thinking” contains incomplete, jumbled sentences and does not develop its point. The phrase “Thus, it is clear that” is left without a continuation, so the reader cannot follow the argument to its conclusion. Connections between ideas are limited, and the conclusion largely repeats the introduction rather than drawing together developed reasons. Use a clear paragraph for each disadvantage, with a topic sentence, explanation, and example, then link them to a direct final judgement.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “well-being,” “creative thinking,” “detrimental impact,” and “leisure activities,” which helps communicate the subject. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand, particularly in the unfinished section: “Latest working patterens changing the life styles” and “facot assocciated to.” Some phrases are also imprecise or repetitive, such as “extra time” and “hours of exercising.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, you could describe “reduced opportunities for physical activity” and explain how “sustained work pressure” affects creativity, rather than relying on repeated references to extra time.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some longer sentence forms, such as the conditional sentence beginning “if people work for extra time,” and the conclusion uses a relative clause. However, control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make meaning unclear. In “they left with no or little time,” the verb form is incorrect; “This ultimately effect on their health” lacks a correctly formed verb pattern; and “professionals who work prolong hours often left” is missing an auxiliary. The sentence about creative thinking is incomplete and has no clear grammatical structure. Most sentences rely on simple patterns, with limited accurate complex construction. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check verb forms, articles, and agreement before submitting.

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