Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities.

Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There are some people who spend much of their time in work than engageing in leisure activities; I believe its disadvantage overweigh its advantage .

first and foremost mental health may be put under danger because as a mobile battery gets off drained also human brain may gets tired.people who get much workload with no rest will be on stress and a hormone called corisol will be produced highly and this inturns affect many systems of the body.

Moreover depression may occur and some chronic health disease may follow it.if anyone get in depression he cannot successed at his work.so, work efficency will also be in question.

There are many leisure activities may performed alone or in a group depending your hobbies like spending time with friends or family,watching movies,going some place (church,cinema),swimming.forinstance I work 8 hours a day in my office and after returning to home I do have some relaxing activities to do like listening to music laying on my bed and usually I went to have a coffee with my neighbour. In doing so I just prepare my mind to do more and be free from any work stress.

On flip side working long hours helps to get payed large amount of money and you can fully cover your bills and helpsto put aside some money for urgent cases.

In conclusion I believe having leisure time is very important for mental wellbeing and balancing working time with doing leisure activity is vital inorder to be in a good health condition.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you believe the disadvantages of long working hours outweigh the financial benefit. You address both sides, explaining possible effects on mental and physical health and noting that higher pay can help people cover bills and save for emergencies. The personal example about relaxing after work also supports your argument. However, the health consequences are asserted more than explained, and the financial advantage receives only brief development. The discussion of leisure activities lists examples, but could connect more directly to why limited leisure is harmful. To strengthen the response, develop each main point with a clearer explanation or a specific example, and make the comparison between the disadvantages and the financial benefit more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: it presents the disadvantages, gives a personal example, acknowledges an advantage, and concludes with your view. Paragraphing helps separate these stages, and transitions such as “Moreover” and “On flip side” signal relationships between ideas. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow. The first paragraph moves quickly from tiredness to stress, hormones, depression, and work efficiency without clearly linking each step. The leisure-activity examples also interrupt the argument before the personal example returns to its main point. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example directly to the claim it supports. More precise referencing and less abrupt movement between points would make the overall organisation easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “mental health,” “workload,” “depression,” “chronic health disease,” and “urgent cases.” There are also attempts to use more specific language, such as “hormone” and “work efficiency.” However, several word choices, collocations, and spelling errors make the expression less natural, for example “disadvantage overweigh its advantage,” “get payed large amount of money,” and “prepare my mind.” Some phrases are also imprecise, such as “some place” and “many systems of the body.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations of words and check spelling carefully. A broader range of precise expressions for describing health effects, financial benefits, and work-life balance would improve clarity and flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional structure in “if anyone get in depression he cannot successed at his work” and a reason-and-result explanation of stress. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction are frequent enough to make some sentences difficult to read. For example, “human brain may gets tired” should use the base form after “may,” while “people who get much workload” needs a more accurate grammatical construction. Several sentences also run together without appropriate punctuation, particularly the opening and the health-effects paragraph. Practise building accurate complex sentences with clear clauses, and check subject–verb agreement, verb forms after modal verbs, and sentence boundaries.

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