Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-07-24
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
In recent years, the growing popularity of using mobile phone wallets to pay for purchases has become significantly common. This development has more drawbacks than benefits because of increasing the chances of fraud and difficulty to use of a certain group of populations.
Electronic payments provide some advantages. Firstly, paying by cellphone is not only convenient but also safer for individuals. In other words, they do not require to carry cash with them which can prevent theft and unexpected lost of paper money. Moreover, this method is faster than paying in cash because a person needs to tap on a payment machine by just one click on a smart phone.
Despite having positive aspects of using digital method for transactions, this trend has several disadvantages. First of all, cybercrime is a major negative aspect as if people want to make payment online, they have to fulfill a basic requirement of this procedure in which they are asked to add bank information for payments. This sensitive detail might be hacked by hackers. As a result, individuals may lose their saving and suffer from financial losses.
Furthermore, digital method of transaction is not popular in a specific age group and a particular community from rural areas because the aged population is not familiar with an advanced technology. Therefore, the older people may struggle to use in their daily lives. In addition, due to limited access of online services in developing areas, rural community cannot adopt to paying with mobile phone applications.
In conclusion, although online transaction offers faster, safer and convenient payment method, I personally believe that this advancement is not beneficial for the geriatric and countryside people as well as increases possibility of cybercrime.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5
The response addresses all parts of the task and maintains a clear position throughout. The arguments regarding security risks and accessibility issues for the elderly and rural populations are relevant and logically developed. However, the development of the 'advantages' section is slightly less detailed than the 'disadvantages' section. To reach a higher band, you could provide more specific examples or elaborate further on how mobile payments impact the broader economy or consumer behavior. Overall, the response is well-structured and directly answers the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central topic, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use a range of cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Moreover', 'Despite', and 'In conclusion' effectively. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as 'this method' or 'this trend', which could be more precisely linked to the preceding sentences. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate and supports the flow of the argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 7.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your ideas clearly. There are some good collocations like 'cybercrime', 'financial losses', and 'digital method of transaction'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'difficulty to use of a certain group' (should be 'difficulty for a certain group to use') and 'geriatric and countryside people' (which sounds slightly unnatural in this context). Expanding your vocabulary to include more precise academic collocations would help improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'they do not require to carry' (should be 'they do not need to carry'), 'unexpected lost of paper money' (should be 'loss'), and 'cannot adopt to paying' (should be 'cannot adapt to paying'). Punctuation is generally correct, but some phrasing is awkward. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct usage of infinitives and prepositions.
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