Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

These days in many countries paying for the apps using on mobiles phones is increasing. This development has more benefits than drawbacks. This essay will discuss why it has more pros with valid reasons.

Firstly, every cellphone is incomplete without apps. Although, app has various adverts while using. It can be avoided by paying which helps to use it in smoother way. For example, by gaining membership in music app spotify person is free from advertisements and they can listen to music without any interuption. In addition, youth are more focused towards fitness. There are certain fitness tracking app which trackes their daily health and routine. Buy suscribing into various app person can stay healthy while measuring their daily goal and calories.

On another hand, childrens are getting addicted to lots of gaming apps. Nowadays, kids have competetion to obtain certain equipments in games to show off their friends. Which can only acquire if they purchase it. Therefore, parents has to pay money to keep their young ones happy. For instance, there is a game app called PUBG where person has to pay to buy new clothes and guns to reach at higher level due to that parents has to spend unnecessary money in those apps. However, this can be reduce by playing in a group where one person can enroll and their friends can use it to play the games. This way they will save money.

In conclusion, every parents cannot afford to pay for the apps. But it can compensate by having group play. Moreover, person can save lot of time by avoiding adverts on ongoing app usage and all the time they can listen music smoothly. Therefore paying for app is getting common in many countries because it has more profit than loss.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of mobile payment apps. However, the interpretation of the task is slightly narrow. The prompt asks about 'paying for things using mobile phone apps' (e.g., Apple Pay, digital wallets), but the essay focuses almost exclusively on 'in-app purchases' (subscriptions, gaming items, ad-free versions). While this is a form of mobile payment, it misses the broader context of digital commerce. The position is clear, but the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive, particularly in the conclusion where the arguments are restated rather than synthesised. To improve, ensure you address the full scope of the topic and provide more nuanced supporting examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'In addition', 'On another hand', and 'In conclusion'. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly misused, such as 'On another hand' (should be 'On the other hand') and 'due to that' which creates a run-on sentence structure. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that referencing (e.g., 'it', 'they') consistently points to the correct antecedent to avoid ambiguity.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'paying for the apps using on mobiles phones' instead of 'paying for services via mobile apps', and 'gaining membership' instead of 'subscribing'. Spelling errors like 'interuption', 'suscribing', 'childrens', and 'competetion' are frequent. While the meaning is generally clear, the limited range of vocabulary and the recurring errors in word formation and spelling prevent the response from reaching a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control is inconsistent. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('parents has to pay', 'app trackes their daily health') and article usage ('the apps', 'a music app'). Punctuation is also problematic, with several sentence fragments or run-on sentences, such as 'Which can only acquire if they purchase it.' While the errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable and suggest a need for more careful proofreading and a better grasp of basic grammatical rules.

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