Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this contemporary world, everyone is trying be updated with the modern era. If we look at the analysis of phone usage for last ten years, every generation risen up the usage of telephones apps. There are numerous reasons of pump in usage of apps due to several advantages, but on the other side contains too much adverse effects as well ,We will discuss both sides of using telephone apps in coming discussion.

On the one hand, we are watching that daily new apps are launching and this applications are not launched without any logical reasons. Companies do social analysis and study statistics for todays' world requirement and then work for startups which make everyone life extremely easy and rapid. For Instance , Netflix is one of the app whose usage was dramatically increased in every county, the main reason behind incline in usage is money saving and time saving. Netflix provide all the content in their application just by creating account and paying subscription, which is much cheaper than theatres like cineplex, that's the reason why public starts using telephone applications, rather than wasting time in completing task in traditional ways .

On the Other hand, incline in telephone applications also surged health and mental problems as well. Phone apps needs screen to run and according to experts and doctors ,watching too much screens cause dramatic problems to person's health ,which is not seen naked eyes. In today's world everyone in trying to make their life easy, but forget to take care about their health.

To conclude, I want to add my opinion that advantages overweight the disadvantages, Because in our daily life we require applications at every stage of routine such as working , studying , teaching. So we can't decline the usage of telephone apps.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of mobile apps. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention Netflix as an example of an advantage, the explanation of disadvantages is vague, focusing on 'health and mental problems' without specific examples or a deeper exploration of the impact. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments lack the depth required for a higher band. To improve, ensure that each point is fully extended with specific evidence or logical reasoning rather than general statements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand' and 'To conclude'. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and there are issues with referencing (e.g., 'this applications' should be 'these applications'). The transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs could be smoother. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, but there are several instances of awkward word choices and collocations. For example, 'pump in usage' is not standard English, and 'incline in usage' should be 'increase'. Additionally, there are minor errors in word formation, such as 'every generation risen up'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. Focus on learning common collocations and using more academic synonyms for basic words like 'easy' or 'problems'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('apps needs screen'), article usage ('the usage of telephones apps'), and punctuation errors (e.g., spaces before commas). While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that plural/singular forms are used correctly throughout your sentences.

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