Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays , cellphones are becoming more popular for their advance features like paying through phone in on touch and even transferring money in few minutes is now available in phones. This essay with reflect both demerits and merits before I present my thoughts.

Firstly ,cellphones are very convenient for paying in one click ,like nowadays people don't prefer taking cash with them ,so that is the best way to use a money online and even some brands offer points system that if you pay online you will get this as free . Moreover, this has reduced the robbery chances because people don't have cash in hands ,so this is safe for everyone to go anywhere without worry about their money.

Additionally , keeping track of money is also available in some payment apps and even through this we can manage our monthly expenses. For example , some apps provide a secure options for getting access to online payment through face IDs or biometrics which is safer then carrying a cash .

Some negative factors are also available in this technology like phone can get off at time of a payment and we don't have any access to battery charging . Futhermore, some small business don't prefer taking online payments ,so in that case cash is essential. For instance , some villages still don't have proper networks in some areas ,so carrying cash is also important as carrying our cellphones in some emergences.

In summary, paying through cellphones is very convenient but carrying a cash is also important in some tensed situations. Taking both factors as equal important for economic growth .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the merits and demerits of mobile payment apps. However, the position is not clearly stated or maintained throughout the essay. While you mention that you will present your thoughts, the conclusion fails to clearly state whether you believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, instead opting for a neutral stance. The ideas are relevant, such as convenience and security, but they are somewhat under-developed. For example, the point about 'points systems' is mentioned but not explained in detail. To reach a higher band, ensure your position is clearly articulated in the introduction and consistently supported throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Moreover', 'Additionally', and 'In summary' to link your ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. Furthermore, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'this is the best way to use a money online', where the pronoun 'this' lacks a precise antecedent. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the transition between the benefits and the drawbacks could be smoother to improve the overall flow of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'popular', 'good', and 'safe'. There are also some issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'use a money online' and 'reduced the robbery chances'. While your meaning is generally clear, the lack of more sophisticated or academic vocabulary limits the score. To improve, try to incorporate more precise terminology related to finance and technology, and pay closer attention to natural collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede the reader's flow. Examples include 'some small business don't prefer' (subject-verb agreement), 'safer then carrying a cash' (incorrect comparative structure and article usage), and 'taking both factors as equal important' (adverb/adjective confusion). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing around commas. While these errors do not completely obscure meaning, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will significantly improve your accuracy.

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