Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In this generation, mobile phones has become a necessity for every human being. Several countries around the world report an increase in electronic wallets via cellphones. In this essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend including my knowledge and experience.
On the one hand, mobile wallets in cellphones is one of the most secure payment methods in this decade. In other worlds, payments made with mobile wallets like ApplePay and SamsungPay are
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is significantly under the required 250-word minimum, reaching only 76 words. Because the essay is incomplete and cuts off abruptly mid-sentence, it fails to address the prompt fully. The position is stated in the introduction, but there is no development of ideas or conclusion. To improve, you must ensure you write at least 250 words, providing a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages with supporting examples. Currently, the task is only partially addressed due to the severe lack of content.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The essay is too short to demonstrate a clear logical progression or effective paragraphing. While you used a transition phrase ('On the one hand'), the text ends before any further cohesive devices or logical development can be established. The structure is currently fragmented. To achieve a higher score, you need to organize your ideas into distinct paragraphs, using a wider range of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'however') to connect your arguments and ensure the flow of ideas is smooth and logical throughout the entire essay.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and functional, such as 'necessity', 'increase', and 'secure'. There is an attempt to use specific terminology like 'electronic wallets', but the range is very limited due to the brevity of the text. There is also a minor error in the phrase 'In other worlds', which should be 'In other words'. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'financial transactions', 'digital infrastructure', or 'convenience', and ensure you check for common idiomatic expressions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are noticeable grammatical errors in the short text provided. For instance, 'mobile phones has become' should be 'mobile phones have become' (subject-verb agreement), and 'mobile wallets in cellphones is' should be 'mobile wallets on cellphones are'. The range of structures is limited to simple sentences. To improve, focus on mastering subject-verb agreement and attempt to use a variety of complex sentence structures, such as relative clauses or conditional sentences, while ensuring that your punctuation and grammar remain accurate throughout the writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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