Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recent years, paid applications have gained immense popularity. Individuals make online payments even for small things like groceries or travel expenses. This essay intends to analyze the advantages as well as the disadvantages of this development in the following paragraphs.

To begin with, there are a plethora of benefits behind this trend. The cardinal one is, convenience and speed in payment. To elaborate it, people can make payment in seconds without carrying cash or card which simplifies every day purchases.A salient example is that, people living in Canada can add their cards to Apple Pay and can easily pay for transport, food, or online services within seconds, reducing waiting times and improving overall efficiency. Additionally, digital payments often provide transaction records, which help individuals manage their finances more effectively. Ultimately, this is a great method to make payments.

Conversely, there are few drawbacks of this trend. The primary one is, availability of network connectivity. To elucidate it, people can utilize convenience of mobile paying apps in only the areas where proper network connection is available . Furthermore, risk of security. To explain it, these days many fake applications are available in market from personal details can be stolen or there are more chances of hacking. For instance, an article published by The New York Times in 2021 stated that 80 % of private data is leaked through fake UPI payment apps. Thus, using these apps can be concern of safety and security.

To recapitulate, a significant number of merits are associated with online payment application such as convenience and speed. However, demerits like security and safety cannot be overlooked.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages. The position is clear from the introduction, and the arguments are relevant. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the point regarding 'transaction records' is mentioned but not fully explained in terms of its impact on financial management. Similarly, the conclusion is quite brief and does not fully synthesize the arguments presented. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand on your supporting examples and provide a more nuanced summary of your position in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Additionally', and 'Conversely' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive, such as the structure 'To elaborate it' and 'To explain it'. Paragraphing is used appropriately, but the flow between sentences within paragraphs could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and better referencing to avoid repetitive sentence structures. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'plethora', 'cardinal', 'salient', and 'elucidate'. While these attempts at less common vocabulary are generally successful, there are some minor inaccuracies in collocation and word choice, such as 'availability of network connectivity' (better as 'reliance on network connectivity') and 'can be concern of safety' (should be 'a concern regarding safety'). The vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, but more precise word choices would elevate the sophistication of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is consistently clear, there are recurring grammatical errors, particularly with articles (e.g., 'the' is missing before 'convenience' and 'risk') and preposition usage. Some sentences are slightly awkward, such as 'from personal details can be stolen', which is grammatically incorrect. You have good control over basic structures, but the frequency of these minor errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for articles and prepositions would significantly improve your accuracy.

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