Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The trend of online payments through digital devices is becoming more popular in many countries. Although handling online transactions are more convenient, I believe this trend has more disadvantages over advantages as it contributes to increasing cyber scams.
One of the disadvantages is that cashless transactions can pose a risk to user's privacy. Using mobile app for transactions can provide details to the website, which can be used inappropriately. For example, when shopping online, most of the websites show options to accept the cookies. It is common that people accept without reading, which can result in releasing secure data from phone. In addition, when entering the details of card, it can automatically saves in the app which can be used by others. As a result, they can fall as a victim.
Furthermore, old people cannot stand out with these digital payments. They struggled to manage the digital apps to make payments as it is difficult for them to remember the password and username. This type of generation prefers to perform a cash payments. For example, elderly person may feel confused when scanning QR code for payment or entering password in public. Therefore, it is evident that they prefer to pay in a cash rather than using the online apps.
To conclude, Online transactions through apps can be useful to some extent as it is hassle-free. However, it can contribute to increasing the cyber crimes. In addition, technological transaction s can pose challenges for the old generation as they are not familiar to manage the digital payments.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the disadvantages of mobile payments outweigh the advantages. The ideas are relevant, focusing on privacy concerns and the digital divide for the elderly. However, the development is somewhat limited. The argument regarding privacy is a bit repetitive, and the point about the elderly could be more deeply explored with more specific consequences. While the position is maintained throughout, the essay would benefit from a more balanced consideration of the advantages before refuting them, as the prompt asks for a comparison. Overall, it covers all parts of the task but remains at a basic level of development.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Furthermore', 'In addition', and 'To conclude', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'they can fall as a victim', where the antecedent for 'they' is slightly ambiguous. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the main points. The progression of ideas is generally clear, though the connection between the introduction and the body paragraphs could be smoother to improve the overall flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the student to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'cashless transactions' and 'cyber scams'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'stand out with these digital payments' (which is unnatural) and 'perform a cash payments' (incorrect article usage). The range is sufficient to communicate the message, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band. The repetition of basic terms like 'payments' and 'apps' also limits the score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('an elderly person', 'a cash payments') and subject-verb agreement ('handling online transactions are', 'it can automatically saves'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor slips throughout. The complexity of the sentences is limited, and the errors, while not impeding communication, are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. More attention to pluralization and verb forms would significantly improve the accuracy of the writing.
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