Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this modernized technological era, mobile phone are considered as the inseparable asset of an individual's life . Owing to this, in many nations, majority of the proponents of society has uplifted their usage of cellphones to pay for the things through distinct mobile applications. This essay will solidify why the upsides overshadows the downsides which are stated in the subsequent paragraphs.

To commence with, there are multifaceted merits of using mobile phones for the payments. The first and foremost benefit is time efficient. To explain in detail, mobile applications can undoubtedly save time of the individual's who want to pay for their things like bills through a smooth mobile application process rather than waiting in a longer queue at any place. Furthermore, the another fistful advantage is the advancement of the technology which has linked the bank accounts in connection with the mobile applications. To explicate, due to the tremendous improvement in the technology had made people work more convenient by giving adequate bank details to the distinct software apps and through a single click they can pay for the things. To exemplify, I personally had an experience with the Remitly application which not only assist me to send money back home but also I can pay for the things despite of having at any geographical location.

On contrary, the only downside of this situation is having the replica of the original application which ultimately lead to the frauds. To specify it further, though having more benefits, there is one disadvantage like the situation where people lose their hard earned money through spurious applications. Therefore, a blind trust on mobile applications can also become a drawback for individual's.

Conclusively, despite of having few drawbacks like transactions through fraud applications can mislead the community, however advantages can overshadows it because this can save their time along with hands on experience with new technology.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages, ultimately taking a clear position that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. The ideas, such as time efficiency and technological convenience, are relevant. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the explanation of 'time efficiency' is repetitive, and the discussion of the disadvantage (fraud) is brief and lacks depth. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed examples or explore the implications of these points further. The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, but the overall development remains at a Band 6 level due to the limited exploration of the points provided.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Furthermore', and 'Conclusively' to guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'the another fistful advantage'. Additionally, there are issues with referencing and sentence-level cohesion; for instance, the phrase 'despite of having at any geographical location' is grammatically unclear and disrupts the flow. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns and references are used more precisely.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'multifaceted', 'spurious', and 'inseparable asset'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors that hinder precision. For example, 'proponents of society has uplifted their usage' is unnatural, and 'fistful advantage' is an incorrect collocation. You also struggle with word forms, such as 'individual's' used as a plural. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, the frequent inaccuracies in word choice and the reliance on some repetitive phrasing prevent a higher score. Focusing on collocations and standard idiomatic usage will help improve this score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('mobile phone are', 'upsides overshadows'), preposition usage ('despite of'), and article usage. Some sentences are also structurally confusing, such as 'due to the tremendous improvement in the technology had made people work more convenient'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are persistent and occur in both simple and complex structures. To improve, you should focus on proofreading for basic agreement and ensuring that complex sentence constructions are grammatically sound.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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