Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Debate exists over whether paying by mobile phone is a beneficial or a limitation, as it is going popularity in many nations. This essay attempts to elucidate both perks and drawbacks of this trend with justified examples.
Convinence and speed are the foremost plus of this approach. Since people can make payments quickly and easily using their smartphones, they do not need to carry cash or cards. Consequently, it saves time and makes everyday transactions more convenient. Essay to track spendings is another significant advantage. For instance, digital payment platforms keep a record of transactions, making it easier for users to track their spending and manage their finances.
Security risks represents one major concern associated with approach. To clarify, smartphone applications store personal and financial information, hackers may steal sensitive data or access user's bank details which therefore create privacy treat. Technical problems are another possible drawback. To exemplify, if the phone battery dies or the internet connection is unavailable, people may be unable to complete their payments. Thus, it creates an issue for the user to make instant payment.
In conclusion, although electronic payments provides
ease of use, rapidity and allows individuals to keep an eye on expenses, however, downsides such as privacy concerns and technical difficulties should not be ignored.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages; however, it fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, ending at 212 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas, as the conclusion is incomplete and the arguments lack sufficient depth or illustrative examples. While the position is clear, the under-length nature of the essay prevents a full development of the topic, leading to a lower score in this criterion.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'consequently,' 'for instance,' and 'to exemplify' are used to link ideas. However, the conclusion is grammatically incomplete and contains a redundant use of 'although' and 'however' in the same sentence, which disrupts the flow. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the abrupt ending limits the overall coherence of the piece.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with some attempts at topic-specific language like 'digital payment platforms' and 'sensitive data.' However, there are several word-choice errors and awkward phrasings, such as 'is going popularity' (gaining popularity) and 'is a beneficial or a limitation' (is beneficial or a limitation). The range is somewhat limited, and the errors occasionally draw attention, though they do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'Security risks represents' (subject-verb agreement), 'privacy treat' (threat), and 'electronic payments provides' (subject-verb agreement). The final sentence is incomplete, which is a significant error. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the frequency of these errors and the lack of a finished concluding sentence indicate a need for better control over basic grammatical structures and punctuation.
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