Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is an undeniable fact that phones are playing paramount role in our daily activities. Payment using a phone is widely seen in today's contemporary world. In numerous countries, it is not unusual to see people using their phones to pay their shopping bills. From my perspective, the advantages can clearly outweigh the disadvantages. In the paragraphs below, I would like to put forth my views with a valid opinion in the conclusion.

To begin with, this generation is called tech-savvy because people know how to take the maximum advantage of the technology as it makes work quicker and safer. For instance, to make a payment using cellphone one does not require to count the cash, and can carry it without a fear of it getting it robbed. Furthermore, it is more safer because it requires the face identification or a password to complete a transaction. Moreover, one can be worry-free from carrying the heavy and bulky wallets.

However, we seldom give a thought to ponder over the other side of the story. Not everyone is familiar with the technology, some people still prefer to use the old cash system. For example, the seniors are not willing to learn a new system that requires them to spend a lot of time on it. Additionally, there are some people that are scared of online hacking and cybercrimes; though, they know how to use it, they prefer keeping it simpler by paying cash.

The seemingly inexorable debate about payments using mobile phones can keep on going. Nevertheless, showing deep reverence for all the aspects and observing a finer nuance of the matter mentioned above, I espouse the notion of supporting the fact that technology is never going to stop developing while it is a personal choice that which mode of payment would be more convenient to one. Although, 20% of people are still avoiding it, in the upcoming years there would be nearly 95% people using phone to make payment; because, there are more benefits than drawbacks.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The ideas are relevant, such as convenience and security, and the counter-argument regarding the elderly and cybercrime is well-integrated. However, the development of these points is somewhat brief. While the position is clear throughout, the conclusion introduces specific statistics (20% and 95%) that were not previously mentioned, which feels slightly disconnected from the earlier analysis. To reach a higher band, ensure that all supporting evidence is introduced in the body paragraphs rather than the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'Nevertheless' are used effectively to guide the reader. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the advantages from the disadvantages. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition into the final paragraph is a bit abrupt. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear, and the essay maintains a consistent focus on the topic throughout.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally appropriate for the task, with some good attempts at less common items like 'paramount', 'tech-savvy', and 'inexorable'. There are occasional inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'put forth my views with a valid opinion' and 'observing a finer nuance'. While the range is sufficient to convey meaning clearly, the use of collocations is sometimes slightly unnatural. The essay avoids repetition, but it lacks the sophisticated, precise control of vocabulary required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'it is more safer' (double comparative), 'does not require to count' (incorrect verb pattern), and 'it is a personal choice that which mode' (awkward phrasing). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. The punctuation is generally accurate, but the control over complex sentence forms needs to be more consistent to demonstrate the flexibility required for Band 7 or above.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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