Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

There is an ongoing debate regarding using mobile to pay money weather it is a good thing or bad. In my opinion this trend has more positive affects than negative. It can make our daily life so easy and convenient.

Major advantage of using mobile app to pay for goods is that it can make payment easy and seamless without fear of getting it stolen. Physical money always come with a fear of losing or getting stolen. Mobile app can eliminate this treat completely and we can do purchase with ease of mind. For example, study done by Harvard shows that using mobile to do payment is more secure than physical money or even a credit or debit card. Because modern technology use facial recognition and password of individuals to make payment more secure.

Moreover, It is really helpful for keeping a trek of spending. Nowadays every bank has their own application where we can see our purchases. The moment we pay for goods from store it instantly add that to our bank statement. For example, individuals can download their bank statement from the bank app for even 5 year old spending.

Drawback of this trend is that there is always a treat of hacking or someone stealing your password. In that situation we can become helpless and hacker can steal all of our money from our bank account. For example, article published by New York Times shows that there have been more than 10,000 hacking is happening every single hour.

In conclusion, although hacking is biggest threat of online payment but with this modern technology we can solve this problem. Online payment has so many good benefits that outweigh it's disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages, and a clear position is maintained throughout. The ideas are relevant, such as convenience, security, and expense tracking. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding security is supported by a general reference to a 'study done by Harvard,' which lacks specific detail. To reach a higher band, you should aim to expand your supporting points with more depth and nuance. The conclusion clearly restates your position that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks, fulfilling the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the topic. You use basic cohesive devices like 'Moreover,' 'For example,' and 'In conclusion' to link ideas. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel repetitive. The use of referencing is generally clear, though the connection between the introduction and the body paragraphs could be smoother. To improve, try to vary your cohesive devices and ensure that each paragraph transitions naturally into the next to create a more cohesive overall argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'seamless,' 'convenient,' and 'outweigh.' However, there are several instances of word choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'pay money weather' (whether), 'make our daily life so easy,' and 'keeping a trek' (track). Additionally, there are minor spelling errors like 'affects' (effects) and 'treat' (threat). To achieve a higher score, focus on using more precise vocabulary and ensuring that your word choices are contextually appropriate and spelled correctly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('a study,' 'the biggest threat'), subject-verb agreement ('Physical money always come'), and pluralization ('10,000 hacking is happening'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some missing commas in complex sentences. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and refining your use of articles and verb forms.

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