Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is becoming increasingly common in many countries for people paying for things using mobile phones (cellphone) apps, asking if this is a positive development or a negative one to the society.

The increasingly rate of people paying for things using mobile phones apps instead of the traditional way of going in person and paying cash or card, in my opinion, it is of great advantage irrespective that there may be some side effects but in my understanding the merits supersedes the disadvantage

First using the mobile apps to make purchases of goods and services saves a lot of time and transport of going to the physical locations to make payments of goods and services. Making it possible for people to order things online and have it delivered to them at the comfort of their homes.

Secondly the increasingly rate of people using mobile payments platforms encourages young creators and app developers to focus on further researches in finding more ways to improve the services of such platforms to the general public bearing in mind that their years of research and hard work will eventually land them huge endorsement deals and rewards. Aside encouraging app developers, this development helps create employment and means of livelihood for the unemployed population through delivery services of goods ordered online.

In conclusion, looking at the relief and time saved from ordering or paying for goods and services using mobile phones (cellphone) apps instead of traveling to the physical locations to do so, one could agree with me that it's increasingly rate of people doing so in many countries of the world is indeed an advantageous development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by identifying the development as advantageous. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention time-saving and the encouragement of app developers, these points are not fully explored with specific examples or deep analysis. The introduction is a bit repetitive and lacks a clear, concise thesis statement. To reach a higher band, ensure that each body paragraph provides a more detailed explanation of the 'why' and 'how' behind your arguments, rather than just stating them. The position is clear, but the overall depth of the response is somewhat superficial.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use basic cohesive devices like 'First', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the connection between app developers and delivery services feels slightly disjointed. Improving the use of linking phrases and ensuring that each sentence flows naturally into the next would enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to convey your meaning, such as 'traditional way', 'physical locations', and 'livelihood'. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'increasingly rate' (should be 'increasing rate') and 'merits supersedes' (should be 'merits supersede'). You rely on some repetitive vocabulary, and there is a lack of more sophisticated or precise collocations that would demonstrate a higher level of lexical control. Focusing on word forms and common collocations will help improve this score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('merits supersedes') and article usage. Some sentences are overly long and lack correct punctuation, which makes them difficult to parse. For example, the opening sentence is a fragment rather than a complete, grammatically sound statement. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement will be beneficial.

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