Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this contemporary era, it is reckoned by certain individuals that purchasing goods and services from smart phones applications is increasing trend in recent days. There are numerous merits and demerits in this statement which i will be elaborated in upcoming paragraphs.

To commence with, why many people consider that paying money of purchasing any items from mobile phones become increasing nowadays? Certainly, yes there are numerous advantages, the predominant is it is more faster and convenient way because everyone is busy due to the have hectic schedule as folks do not have enough time to go the markets and shopping stores to purchase goods and services due to this reason, individuals always prefer to order items from online sites through payment as they can not only save the excessive amount to time but also saves the expense of transportation. Furthermore, paying online from some application through mobile phone has more safer and secure because of latest version of features such as, using fingerprints and face recognition while sending payments from bank account. For example, a recent article had been conducted by Hindustan magazine which revealed that approximately 92% of people used some online sites to brought some essential items as they saves more time and money because of got some extra discounts in some sites.

Moving further to the another sites, if people sending money for buying any goods and services from mobile phones, then the case of fraud will become more nowadays because of not only some companies doing scams but also hacked the bank account or stolen the personal information due to this reason, people suffer with big fraud in their life and they eventually suffering with depression and stress. Additionally, some time individuals has in hurry way due to this reason people sending overspending money to some online apps as they loss lot of money from bank. To exemplify, a recent survey had been conducted by UK poll authority which found that around 87% of pupil suffered with scam problems because of using fake sites to order some items from online applications as they had under stressed.

In conclusion, although purchasing any essential goods and services from paying through smart phones apps has become more weightage in recent period as a safer side, some sites have latest features as they doing more scam or frauds due to eventually which has detrimental impacts on human lifestyle.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of mobile payment apps. The position is clear, and the ideas are extended with relevant examples, such as the mention of security features and the risks of fraud. However, the development is occasionally repetitive, and some arguments, such as the claim that people suffer from depression due to financial loss, are somewhat over-generalized. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully explored with more nuanced reasoning rather than relying on extreme examples. The response covers all parts of the prompt well, but the depth of analysis could be improved to move beyond surface-level observations.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence with', 'Furthermore', and 'Moving further to the another sites'. However, some of these transitions are slightly awkward or misused, such as 'Moving further to the another sites', which does not accurately introduce a counter-argument. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, and the flow between sentences can feel mechanical. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would enhance the overall coherence of the essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common items, such as 'contemporary era', 'predominant', and 'detrimental impacts'. However, there are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'paying money of purchasing', 'has more safer', and 'people has in hurry way'. These errors occasionally distract the reader but do not impede communication. To improve, focus on learning the correct collocations for common phrases and ensuring that words are used in their appropriate grammatical form.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the student attempts complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('individuals has', 'sites have... as they doing'), incorrect verb tenses ('had been conducted', 'used some online sites to brought'), and missing articles. These errors are noticeable and occur throughout the response. To achieve a higher band, the student needs to focus on basic grammatical accuracy and ensure that complex structures are formed correctly, as the current frequency of errors is a limiting factor.

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