Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
It is often argued that payment through cell phones are feasible option, while others believe that it has many adverse problems. Although both the perspectives have their own merits, this essay will discuss both views before explaining why I believe that online payments is more convincing.
On the one hand, there are several reasons why people support the idea that mobile payment has more advantages. Firstly, in emergency situation when people have no card access due to some technical glitches phone payments can actually become life saver. Lastly, banks associated with the commercial firms drafted a point system. This will ultimately result in getting rewards in return. For instance, In China, any individuals who gather upto 10k points with mobile pay, that person can get a free one way air ticket inside China.
On the other hand, many people argue that these type of payments are having high financial risks. One of the key reason is that many fraudsters are using the faulty links by which if any unknown individuals access it for payments. This will leads to deduction of the money more than what it shows on the screen. Another notable reason is that it can easily invites the technical bugs which will ultimately causes whole mobile system get hampered.
In conclusion, while some people believe that mobile payments make life fast and easy, others argue in favor of using the mobile payments as it significantly harm bank accounts and phone system. Taking everthing in account, I firmly believe that online payments are not only helps a physical cards free life but also provide some benefit in return, making it more practical and beneficial options.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. The ideas are relevant, such as the mention of reward systems and security risks. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the discussion on 'fraudsters' and 'technical bugs' is a bit generic and could have been supported with more specific examples or deeper analysis to reach a higher band. The conclusion is slightly contradictory, as it mentions the benefits of mobile payments while also referencing the harms mentioned in the body paragraph, which slightly confuses the final stance. Overall, the task is addressed, but the depth of argument is inconsistent.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'Lastly', and 'On the other hand', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Lastly' used to introduce a second point in the first body paragraph. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'This will leads to deduction of the money', where the antecedent is not perfectly established. Paragraphing is present, but the flow between sentences could be smoother to improve the overall progression of ideas.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their meaning clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'technical glitches', 'commercial firms', and 'fraudsters'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'these type of payments are having high financial risks' (should be 'pose high financial risks') and 'it can easily invites the technical bugs' (should be 'invites technical bugs'). The range is sufficient for the task, but the lack of precision and occasional awkward phrasing prevents a higher score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('payment... are', 'online payments is', 'it can easily invites'), article misuse, and tense inconsistencies ('This will leads to'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, the student should focus on subject-verb agreement and ensure that complex structures are formed accurately, as the current level of control is inconsistent.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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