Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The rapid shift toward mobile phone payments is a major technological. While it introduces security risks, the advantages of mobile payments outweigh the disadvantages due to the unmatched efficenshy, and financial tracking they offer.
This is easy and safe idea to do all the payments and online shoping
because, If someone want to buy anything he can buy online with mobilephone and pay at same time.
for example,I do shoping online yestreday and i am not in home I jusy buy and pay with my phone the things delevor in my home without any problem.
The primary risks of mobile payments such as security and technical are constantly being mitigated by advancements in encryption, biometrics, and offline payment capabilities. The time saved, the reduction in physical theft, and the ease of managing personal finances provide a net positive impact on daily life and modern.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The student attempts to address the prompt regarding the advantages and disadvantages of mobile phone payments. While a position is presented in the introduction stating that advantages outweigh disadvantages due to efficiency and financial tracking, the development of ideas is severely limited. The response is heavily restricted by its length, containing only 144 words, which falls significantly short of the 250-word minimum requirement. Consequently, the arguments are underdeveloped, particularly regarding the disadvantages and financial tracking mentioned in the thesis. Examples are simplistic, such as a brief personal anecdote about shopping online. Because the length requirement was not met, the task achievement score is directly penalized, reflecting an insufficient development of the prompt's requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The text demonstrates a basic attempt at paragraphing, with an introduction, a body paragraph containing a personal example, and a concluding remark. However, the overall organizational structure is disjointed. Cohesive devices are minimal and sometimes inaccurate, such as using comma splices and abrupt transitions like 'for example,I do shoping online yestreday'. Logical progression between sentences is frequently disrupted by fragmented phrasing and abrupt shifts in thought. Referencing is unclear in places, such as the dangling modifier in the final sentence ending with 'and modern.' Despite these flaws, there is a rudimentary attempt to group ideas related to safety and efficiency, preventing a complete breakdown of coherence.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, frequently impeded by spelling and word-choice errors. Examples of lexical limitations include 'efficenshy' (efficiency), 'shoping' (shopping), 'yestreday' (yesterday), and 'delevor' (delivered). The student attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'encryption', 'biometrics', and 'mitigated', which demonstrates a glimmer of lexical range, but these terms are often embedded in awkward or incomplete syntactic structures. While the intended meaning can generally be discerned despite spelling mistakes, the overall resource is limited and strains the reader at times.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. While there are a few simple sentences that are understandable, attempts at complex structures frequently result in serious errors, such as missing verbs, incorrect verb tenses ('I am not in home I jusy buy'), and severe punctuation faults like comma splices. Agreement issues and missing articles are prevalent throughout the text. The majority of sentences contain grammatical inaccuracies that interfere with readability, placing the performance firmly in the lower-middle bands for grammatical accuracy.
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