Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In today's rapidly envolving world, cellphones has bought about significant transformation the way we are pay for things to buy and reserve.While some people praise its benefits other highligh associated drawbacks. I consider this trend has more pros than cons since it include comfortable life and converience of every single item,override any of its negatives.
Commencing with the most silent advantage,comfortable life we can get through mobile apps. Whenever people find something special to order through social media for someone special, they do not need to go anyone to buy anything .By sitting on their couch, They can order anything with paying debit card or many other ways such as paypal or google pay. To quote an example, Last month i got school zone ticket to pay. I just paid the amount through my debit card rather than visiting court to pay the amount for ticket .Another worth considering benefit is that conveience in life. Sophisticated technology allowing us to pay our phone bill, wi-fi bill and electricity bill online through their site. These paying bills through mobile phone has made our life more convient .
As such, this perspective not knly aligns with pratical needs but also reflects sound judgment in addressing moderen challenges. It is very good way to pay for all things through card or online but what if card stolen or we lost . There are chances that might be somebody will use our card without our permession if he knowns us very well he might be able to add all the necessary answers that app will ask. To illustrate, recently i used my friend's laptop to book for doctor appoitment where i need to pay the fees for appointment . I added my information in the application and card details to proceed ,on very next day i relaised my card used to online purchase. Then after investigating all i found that puschase made by my friend . when i asked her about transaction she noticed that she paid bymistake using my card and applolize me after that.Cosequently, sonetimes this paying online system can put us in tough situation and dielema .
In conclusion. although , it is understanble that some may take diffeerent views. I completely believe that paying online for things giving us more convience and comfortable life
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position throughout, arguing that mobile payment apps have more advantages than disadvantages. Relevant ideas are introduced, such as convenience in daily transactions and saving time, which meets the requirements for this level. However, some ideas are under-developed or inadequately supported. For instance, the discussion on the advantages is repetitive, mentioning convenience and comfortable life multiple times without expanding into broader societal or economic implications. Similarly, the counterargument regarding security and stolen cards relies heavily on a single personal anecdote rather than fully exploring the wider implications of digital security risks. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to extend and support ideas with more depth and broader reasoning rather than depending on basic personal examples.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance stated in the introduction and reinforced in the conclusion, providing a recognizable progression of ideas. Paragraphing is used to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, though the internal structure of the body paragraphs could be more cohesive. Cohesive devices are employed, but referencing and transitional phrases are sometimes mechanical or faulty, such as starting sentences with phrases like 'Commencing with the most silent advantage' or 'As such, this perspective not only aligns'. Additionally, pronoun referencing is occasionally unclear, which disrupts the flow of reading. To achieve a higher standard, the writer should employ a wider and more natural range of cohesive devices and ensure that logical relationships between sentences are managed more smoothly.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common lexical items such as 'sophisticated technology', 'transaction', and 'dilemma'. However, there are noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling throughout the text, including 'envolving' instead of evolving, 'bought' instead of brought, 'silent' instead of salient, 'conveience' instead of convenience, 'knly' instead of only, 'pratical', 'moderen', 'appoitment', 'relaised', 'puschase', 'applおize', and 'understandble'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently and reflect a limited lexical control. To improve, the writer must focus on expanding vocabulary accuracy, mastering spelling, and ensuring proper word forms and collocations are used.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting relative clauses and conditional structures. However, there are frequent errors in grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure that cause difficulty for the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues such as 'cellphones has bought' and 'technology allowing', missing articles, incorrect prepositions, and fragmented sentences like 'In conclusion. although , it is understanble...'. Many attempts at complex sentences are faulty, resulting in awkward phrasing such as 'when i needed to pay the fees for appointment . I added my information in the application and card details to proceed ,on very next day i relaised my card used to online purchase.' To move up, the writer needs to demonstrate better control over basic grammatical structures, reduce punctuation errors, and ensure that complex sentences are constructed accurately.
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