Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Over the past Few decades, mobile banking has become increasingly common. while this trend presents some drawbacks, the overall benefits are far more significant. This essay will argue that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

One significant advantage of paying through mobile is convinence. To be more precise, earlier people have to carry cash wherever they go and if they do not have cash, they were unable to by things and services. meanwhile, now in some contry peopel do not need to bother about cash everywhere, they can simply pay by moblie apps.

For example, in the current survey, many humankind said that internet banking and applications made their life much more easier. Thus, it is belived that this is beneficial.

Morever, less stress of thefting could be the another advantage of moblie banking because people do not have to worry about theft as they do not have money in their pockets. on top of that, if somene stole their cell phone or card, they can immediately block the cards and inhibit the transcations. Hence, it is more significant than traditional payment methods.

Although, there are some disadvantages, they are relatively minor compares to benefits. The main drawback is the digital crime. Howerer, this issue can often be mitigated by spreading awarness. Therefore, the advantages clearly outweigh the disadvantages.

In conclusion, although using mobile banking has

certain drawbacks, its benefits are significantly greater.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear from the introduction and conclusion: you believe the benefits of mobile payments outweigh the drawbacks. You also address both sides, identifying convenience and reduced risk of carrying cash as advantages, and digital crime as a disadvantage. However, the ideas are only partly developed. The survey example is vague (“many humankind”) and does not explain what was surveyed or provide a specific illustration; the point about blocking cards also needs clearer explanation of how this applies to mobile payments. The response is 18 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop and support your reasons. Add a concrete example and explain the risks and safeguards more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. This makes your main position easy to follow. You also use linking expressions such as “For example,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion.” However, some connections feel mechanical or do not clearly show the relationship between ideas. For instance, “Thus, it is believed that this is beneficial” repeats the preceding claim rather than extending it, while “Hence, it is more significant than traditional payment methods” has an unclear reference. The paragraph about convenience would also benefit from clearer sentence boundaries and a more direct progression from the problem of carrying cash to the benefit of apps. Use linking phrases selectively and make each sentence build on the previous one.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “mobile banking,” “digital crime,” “traditional payment methods,” and “mitigated.” These choices show an attempt to discuss the issue beyond very basic terms. However, the range is limited and several spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make parts of the response difficult to read, such as “convinence,” “thefting,” “transcations,” and “less stress of thefting.” Some expressions are also unnatural, including “many humankind” and “their life much more easier.” Aim for accurate, natural phrases rather than forcing complex wording. Proofread spelling carefully and learn common collocations such as “risk of theft,” “make life easier,” and “carry cash.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast clause beginning “Although” and a conditional sentence about not having cash. The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence structure, verb forms, agreement, articles, and punctuation sometimes make the reader work to understand your points. For example, “earlier people have to carry cash” shifts tense awkwardly, and “if they do not have cash, they were unable” mixes present and past forms. The sentence beginning “Although, there are some disadvantages” uses the concessive clause incorrectly, and several sentences run together with commas. Practise keeping tense consistent and separating complete ideas with full stops; then check articles and subject–verb agreement.

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