Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In the contemporary era, in many countries, paying for things using cellphone apps is becoming more common and has become a subject of considerable debate. While this trend has drawbacks, I believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. This eassy will discuss the key aspect of this issue and justify my position.

The most significant point to consider is people are very busy in their lives. This is primarily because their tough work and they don't have any time to go to bank and pay their bills. They simply use mobile phone apps to paying for things. A compelling example of this can be observed in individual have no time to go to main bank and stand their for several hours and waite for their trun. So, they paying bills online.

In addition to the above, another crucial factor is technology has been very fast and AI era. The underlying reason reason is that this takes only few mintuns rather than hours. To illustrate this point, technology have important and daily part of lives. This demonstrates that technology has great impact on human lives. It makes their lives easy rather than tough. Hence, it is evident that technology have great concern on human minds and control. On the other hand, it has main disadvantage that cellphone control human behaviour, people who use alot have depression and mood swings. So, moderation use is better than using all the time.

I have been seen a person who is totally relay on cellphone apps once he download a very dangerous app like dark web. They commit a suicide almost but on that time their parents arrived and they saved their child and now he is under treatment programme. So, moderate use is the key.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You state a clear overall view in the introduction: “the advantages outweigh the disadvantages,” and you give relevant reasons, especially the convenience of paying bills without travelling to a bank. You also acknowledge a disadvantage involving excessive phone use. However, the response only partially develops the comparison asked for. The main advantages are repeated in general terms, while the discussion of depression, mood swings, and the “dark web” shifts from payment apps to cellphone use more broadly. The personal example is serious but does not clearly show how mobile payments themselves cause harm. To strengthen the response, explain specific benefits and drawbacks of app-based payments, support each with relevant examples, and make the comparison behind your position more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a concluding point, and phrases such as “In addition to the above” and “On the other hand” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, the overall progression is not consistently clear. The second body paragraph moves from technology’s speed to its general impact, then to mental health and a personal story, without clearly connecting these points to paying for things through apps. Some linking phrases are repetitive or do not accurately signal the relationship between ideas. The final paragraph also introduces a new example rather than drawing the argument together. Organise the essay around distinct advantages and disadvantages, use each paragraph to develop one main point, and finish by briefly reaffirming why the advantages outweigh the drawbacks.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “cellphone apps,” “pay their bills,” “technology,” and “moderation,” and you attempt more formal expressions such as “considerable debate” and “underlying reason.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “technology has been very fast and AI era” and “technology has great concern on human minds and control” do not express clear ideas. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “eassy,” “mintuns,” “waite,” and “trun.” Aim for precise language connected to digital payments, such as convenience, transaction, security, and privacy, and check spelling and natural word combinations during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “While this trend has drawbacks” and a reason introduced by “because.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors occur frequently enough to make several sentences hard to understand. Examples include “people are very busy in their lives” after “The most significant point to consider is,” “they don't have any time to go to bank,” and “They simply use mobile phone apps to paying for things.” Subject–verb agreement is also unreliable in “technology have” and “technology has been very fast and AI era.” Some sentence boundaries and clauses are awkward, particularly in the personal example. Practise accurate verb forms, articles, agreement, and complete sentence structures before adding more complex clauses.

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