Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In various contries, moblie phones apps are becoming popular to pay for items during purchases. In my perspective, its disadvantage of online theft os more concerning rather than its advantage of the convenience to carring the mobile.
There are several benefits of using mobile applications as a payment method. A major advantage is that using the cellphone apps is more convenientent to carry and use. Mobiles have become an integral part of people's lives as carring phones is better than wallets full of cash and cards ,whcih are little harder for people to keep all the time. For example, when individuals make purchases using moblie apps, they would not worry to carry all of their cards or cash anymore with them. Consequently, using mobile app is befenficial in term of keeping conveniently.
However, paying for things with cellphone apps also has some drawbacks. The main concern is the theft of personal bank information. Filling personal information in these applications can enhance the risk of stealing card details and bank information, which give rise to money theft. For instance, during online shopping on unverified websites, can steal fund from individuals' bank account, even though the person paid with trustable platforms such as apple pay or UPI. As a result, people could lose their finances unless it is used with custious.
In conclusion, although using mobile phone apps for paying for the services and products are becoming common, its adverse consequence of banking theft outweight the benefit as the replacement of card and cash carrier.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You address both sides of the question and make your position clear: you acknowledge convenience but conclude that the risk of banking theft is more serious. The body paragraphs give relevant reasons and examples, including carrying a phone instead of cash and cards, and the possibility of financial loss through online payments. However, the advantages are less fully developed than the disadvantage, and the example about unverified websites is not clearly connected to the security of payment apps such as Apple Pay or UPI. Explain more precisely how the risk arises and support the convenience point with a specific situation. This would make the comparison and your reasoning more convincing.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for benefits and drawbacks, and a conclusion that restates your view. Transitions such as “However” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the argument, and the main point of each body paragraph is identifiable. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger progression. At times, though, links between ideas are mechanical or unclear. For example, “As a result” introduces a consequence that is not fully explained, while the example about unverified websites shifts from payment apps to online shopping. Use clearer references and explain how each example supports the paragraph’s main claim.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “integral part,” “personal bank information,” “risk,” and “consequence,” so the reader can understand the main argument. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation errors reduce precision: “convenientent,” “carring,” “banking theft,” and “replacement of card and cash carrier.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “keeping conveniently” and “trustable platforms.” These errors sometimes make the intended meaning less clear, particularly in the conclusion and the example about online shopping. Build a more accurate set of topic-specific expressions and check spelling and collocations carefully.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “cash and cards, which are little harder” and a conditional structure in “unless it is used with…” This shows some range, and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. However, some grammatical errors affect clarity. For example, “using mobile app is beneficial” needs an article or plural form, and “which give rise” does not agree with the singular subject “Filling personal information.” The sentence beginning “For instance, during online shopping…” is incomplete, and the final sentence has problems with subject–verb agreement and sentence structure. Review articles, agreement, and complete clause construction, especially in longer sentences.
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