Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent time, It is popular globally that people are using mobile phones apps for their most of the transactions. The use of cellphones for payments have some advantages such as,convieninet option and less time consuming as well as disadvantage such as, diffucult for some age group. I believe that advantages are outweigh the demerits.

There are some advantages of using the smartphone for daily transactions. First and foremost one is that person do not need to carry cash everytime. It is hard to carry a large amount of cash in case of urgency. It also sacrificing the security of individual.For example, nowdays it is important in many hospitals to pay first and then person can initiate with treatments. Hense in that emergency situation they can pay by using their mobile device rather than standing in long waiting bank queue.Moreover, using mobile transaction can also helpful for rapid transactions and exchange rates. People can easily transfer their money to another countries by using the mobile apps.To illustrate this, in recent time people are using one app called "Remitly" for sending money to abroad to their loved once in minutes and also give the appropriate current exchange rate. Therefore, using the cellphones for the money transactions are benefiatial for many reasons.

However, There are also some disadvantages of mobile payment apps. It is also hard to learn for some age group. Furthermore, It is harmful for specially for the elderly people due to lack of knowledge of the technology. It is highly possible chances for them to get in to any money trap and scam as well as chances of wrong transactions.

To sum up, there are the many positive reasons for using the mobile transactions for the people such as time saving and easy payments. Though there are some cons also stand for old people difficulty for using that online payment method. Nevertheless, It is useful for the people with the adequate knowldge of the modern technology.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you believe the advantages of app-based payments outweigh the disadvantages, and you address both sides of the question. The points about avoiding cash, making urgent hospital payments, and transferring money internationally are relevant, with the Remitly example helping to illustrate the latter. This gives the response a solid, task-focused foundation. However, some ideas are more fully supported than others: the hospital example is not clearly connected to the claim about security, while the disadvantages are listed—difficulty for older users, scams, and mistaken transactions—without explaining their effects or offering an example. Develop these points more evenly and clarify how each supports your overall judgement to make the argument more complete and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, a paragraph on disadvantages, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “First and foremost,” “Moreover,” “However,” and “To sum up” help readers follow the main stages of the argument. The progression is generally logical, but some links between ideas are abrupt or unclear. For instance, “It also sacrificing the security of individual” does not clearly explain how avoiding cash affects security, and the hospital example follows without a smooth connection. The conclusion repeats the main points rather than drawing them together. Use clearer referencing and add brief explanatory links between claims and examples; this would make cohesion less mechanical and the progression more consistently controlled.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “transactions,” “exchange rates,” “scam,” and “wrong transactions,” and the Remitly example shows an attempt to use specific language. However, inaccurate spelling and word choice are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause: “convieninet,” “diffucult,” “benefiatial,” and “knowldge” are misspelled, while “money trap” and “wrong transactions” are imprecise in this context. Some phrases also sound unnatural, such as “sending money to abroad” and “their loved once.” This fits a developing range: you can communicate the main ideas, but control of collocation and spelling is inconsistent. Check spelling carefully and learn common topic-specific combinations, such as “make a payment” and “fall victim to a scam.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including sentences beginning with “For example” and “Though,” and the overall meaning is usually understandable. However, errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction recur. For example, “The use of cellphones for payments have” should use a singular verb, and “person do not need” needs an article and matching verb form. The construction “It also sacrificing” is incomplete, while “It is highly possible chances for them” is not grammatically well formed. Punctuation and capitalisation are also inconsistent, particularly after sentence openings such as “However.” To improve, practise building accurate subject–verb patterns and checking each sentence for a complete verb structure before adding more complex clauses.

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