Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Across varoius parts of the globe, digital payments through mobile phones are getting popular. Our new generation prefer to do more online payments as it is more reliable and convenient. In my opinion there are more advanatages than disadvatages to this argument. This essay will discuss advantages outweigh disadvantages.

First and foremost, convenience: carrying phones are the part of our life and having your bank wallet as an app, makes life more easy. This helps to lighten the travel as people don't have take a purse, plastic cards or hard money. Moreover, it brings protection and security to money. As all bank details are encrypted and application contains face lock. Which can only be authorized by the account holder. According to a survey in metropolian city New delhi, India, there is a huge reduction in pickpocketing. Which encourage more public to adopt new ways of payments. Additionally, this mesure supports in keeping good record of all the expenses. This leads to control on purchasing power and to develop good budget plan.

On the other side, traditional ways: our currency notes, coins depicts the remberance of our warriors of country. However, tap in phone doesn't hold that sentiment. This decline the trend of juveniles to connect with their roots. Furthermore, cybercrime: technological advancement increased the rate of online crimes such as account hacking, frauds, misleading. According to a survey, there is an substantail increase in online fraud in just last 6 months.

In conclusion, I firmly agree that usage of mobile phones for payments carry more advantages than disadvantages. Digital world has become an essential part of modern life, its drawbacks must be managed through conscious efforts. Many steps could be taken by the government to spread awareness reagrding the online crimes. I believe it is best to combine the two in moderation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction—mobile payments have more advantages—and it is maintained in the conclusion. You address both sides with relevant points: convenience, security and budgeting are weighed against loss of cultural sentiment and cybercrime. The examples about pickpocketing in New Delhi and online fraud help make the discussion more specific. However, some ideas are not fully explained. For instance, the claim that digital payments weaken young people’s connection with their roots needs a clearer link to the question, and the fraud point would be stronger with an explanation of its impact or how it compares with the benefits. Develop these points more evenly and make the comparison behind your overall judgement explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion that restates your view. Sequencing is generally easy to follow, and signposts such as “First and foremost,” “Moreover,” and “On the other side” show how points relate. At times, however, cohesion feels mechanical, and some links are unclear. For example, “Which can only be authorized by the account holder” is separated from the preceding sentence, while “This decline the trend” does not clearly identify what “this” refers to. The conclusion also introduces moderation after arguing that advantages outweigh disadvantages, without explaining how the two ideas fit together. Use clearer references and connect each example directly to its main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “encrypted,” “pickpocketing,” “purchasing power,” and “cybercrime,” and you attempt some less common expressions. However, noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, as in “varoius,” “advanatages,” “metropolian,” and “substantail.” Some combinations are also unnatural or unclear: “lighten the travel,” “hard money,” and “misleading” as a type of online crime. “Our new generation” and “plastic cards” could be expressed more naturally in this context. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding the main argument, but careful proofreading and more accurate collocations would make your vocabulary more controlled and flexible.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and more complex structures, including a conditional-style explanation of security and a sentence beginning “As all bank details are encrypted.” The overall meaning is usually clear, but some grammatical errors occur in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries. For example, “Our new generation prefer” needs subject–verb agreement, and “carrying phones are the part of our life” has problems with number and article use. “Which can only be authorized…” and “Which encourage more public…” are incomplete sentences; connect these clauses to the preceding sentences and use the correct verb form. The conclusion’s “usage … carry” also needs agreement. More consistent control of these patterns, alongside varied sentence structures, would improve accuracy.

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