Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In this contemporary world, individuals are swamped in their schedule to earn more and more money to make them selves financialy stable. Todays most of the individual grumble that they have trouble getting sufficient sleep. This essay will delve deep into the reasons behind this trend and provide and will provide effective remedy in its forthcoming paragraphs.

To commence with, there are myriad of reason why people have trouble to get enough sleep. The predominant one is that, individuals are buys in their office work and they do over time to complete the porjects to present on given time. As a result, they skip they sleep cycle and disturb their sleeping routine. Besides this, people are endulged in rat race to menatin luxury lifestyle and their stauts to achive theis they do late night work regularly and leads to difficulties in sleep. Consequently, to mentaning high status they work hard to pey their bills on time. Moreover, watching late night televisons and mobile phones leads to eye-strain through the bule rayes of these devices. These devices impact on sleeping cycle of human being.

On the paradoxical side, there are plethora of measures can be take to reduce lack of sleep. The first and foremost is that the administration should introduce programs for work life balance. As a result, organization can limit the working hours and reduce the pressure on workers. What is more, spend time with family and friends after working hourse. Consequenty, it can helps to reduce stress and anxity which may hinder during sleep. Lastly, regular exercise and yoga can reduce the trouble in sleeping, multiple yoga postures assists to correct body posture.

To recaplitulate, there are numerous reasons why people getting trouble for enough sleep. such as work pressure, mentain luxury lifestyle and high screen time. However, the reasons to solve this problem cannot be neglected, such as government should introduce work life balance programs, spend time with family and friends and regylar exercise and yoga.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the causes of sleep deprivation and potential solutions. The ideas are relevant, such as work pressure and screen time, and the solutions, like government intervention and lifestyle changes, are logical. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the explanation of how 'blue rays' impact sleep is brief, and the connection between yoga and sleep could be more explicitly linked to stress reduction. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your points with more detailed explanations or specific examples rather than listing multiple ideas in a single paragraph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Besides this', and 'Consequently'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as 'On the paradoxical side', which is not the standard phrase for introducing a counter-argument or a new perspective. Additionally, some sentences lack smooth transitions, making the flow feel a bit disjointed. Improving the variety and naturalness of your linking words will help the ideas connect more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to convey your ideas, using terms like 'contemporary', 'predominant', and 'administration'. However, there are several spelling errors ('financialy', 'buys' instead of 'busy', 'porjects', 'endulged', 'mentain', 'stauts', 'bule rayes', 'anxity', 'recaplitulate') and collocation issues ('getting trouble for enough sleep'). These errors are frequent enough to occasionally distract the reader. To improve, focus on proofreading your work for common spelling mistakes and ensuring that word choices are natural and precise in the context of the sentence.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, they often contain grammatical errors, such as 'there are plethora of measures can be take' (should be 'there are a plethora of measures that can be taken') and 'it can helps to reduce' (should be 'it can help to reduce'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. The frequency of these errors, especially in subject-verb agreement and verb forms, indicates that you need to focus on mastering basic sentence construction before consistently using more complex forms.

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