Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's world where many people are facing various difficulties due to an improper sleeping schedule or insomnia. There can be several causes which has negative effect on getting enough sleep. But every problem comes with the solution. In this essay, I will discuss the possibilities which often affect sleep and what measures should be taken to prevent this condition.

To begin with, as technology has made our lives easier but some people still do not refrain from their excessive usage habits which results in various problems such as, addiction and anxiety. For example, in Canada government conducted a recent survey and found about the history of bad sleeping habits particularly among young children. Furthermore, it is observed that many children have a daily habit of using technology such as smartphones. As a result, they have to overcome several hurdles while sleeping.

Moreover, parents should take responsibility to their children and carefully nurture them so that they can distinguish right from wrong. For example, parents should allow their children to indulge in various extracurricular activities and completely restricts technology usage. As this step will result in refreshing their mind, keeping them busy in other activities. Consequently, they will develop to well rounded individuals while simultaneously managing their overall day schedule. This measure will not only benefits in sleeping but also keep them busy and increases their potential.

In conclusion, while many people do face various hindrances in sleeping particularly young users. But to alleviate this cause parents can take careful measures to prevent their children from more harm. And can work on proper regulations so that children may be able to work in the right direction.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses both parts of the prompt: the problems caused by lack of sleep and potential solutions. However, the development is somewhat uneven. While you mention anxiety and addiction as problems, the explanation remains quite general. The solution section focuses exclusively on children, which narrows the scope of the response significantly, as the prompt asks about 'many people' generally. To reach a higher band, ensure your arguments are balanced and fully developed for the broader population mentioned in the question. Your position is clear, but the supporting examples, such as the reference to a Canadian survey, lack specific detail to fully substantiate your points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are instances where sentence structure impacts flow. For example, the opening paragraph contains a sentence fragment ('In today's world where...'), which disrupts the coherence of the introduction. Additionally, the referencing within paragraphs could be tighter to ensure that the link between the problem and the proposed solution is more seamless.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'insomnia', 'extracurricular', and 'alleviate'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation that limit the score. For instance, you write 'take responsibility to their children' (should be 'for') and 'completely restricts technology usage' (should be 'restrict'). While these errors do not impede communication, they indicate a lack of precision. To improve, focus on using collocations more accurately and expanding your range of academic vocabulary to avoid repeating words like 'problems' and 'activities'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the overall quality. You have several sentence fragments, such as 'In today's world where many people are facing various difficulties due to an improper sleeping schedule or insomnia.' This is a dependent clause and not a complete sentence. There are also subject-verb agreement issues, such as 'causes which has negative effect' (should be 'have') and 'measure will not only benefits' (should be 'benefit'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors prevent the essay from reaching a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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