Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, the issue of insomnia has been increasingly on a fast pace. Many individuals have troubles in getting adequate sleep due to which they face difficulty in relaxing their mind. This trend can be attributed to several factors such as excessive use of screens, depression, and addiction of drugs. This essay will explain the problems associated with this issue and suggest some measures to address it.

To begin with, the most prominent reason is that increased use of bright screens. What I mean by this is that people spend their time on their phones for various reasons such as to play games, study which impact their sleep pattern. Another significant reason is stress, because of it many people do overthinking which creates difficulty in getting rest. For example, many youngsters use their mobile phones till late night which imbalances their sleep hormones and also, impact their brain functioning. Consequently, more use of bright screens and overthinking can lack of sleep cause which is not good for their mental well-being.

Despite the problems, there are some solutions also. The primary solution is excess use of mobile phones should be limited, it can help to balance the hormones and improve the nervous system. Furthermore, people should not take unnecessary burden of things, they should try to relax their mind by finding alternative methods such as listen to music, dancing and walking. Ultimately, these activities can help their mind to get refresh and make them tired. As a result, less screen timing and pastimes can be beneficial for the people to improve their sleep habits.

In conclusion, although excess use of electronic devices can negatively impact sleep, preventing using screens more often and entertainment pursuits can boost an adequate sleep among people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the problems caused by lack of sleep and potential solutions. However, the development is somewhat uneven. While you identify screen time and stress as causes, the explanation of the actual 'problems' (consequences) is underdeveloped. You mention 'mental well-being' and 'brain functioning' but do not elaborate on the specific impacts, such as reduced productivity, health risks, or emotional instability. The solutions are also presented in a somewhat generic manner. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is supported by a clear explanation or a specific example that demonstrates the depth of your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To begin with,' 'Another significant reason,' and 'In conclusion,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Despite the problems, there are some solutions also.' Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, and some sentences lack smooth flow due to grammatical errors. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence connects logically to the previous one would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some relevant terms like 'insomnia,' 'adequate sleep,' and 'mental well-being.' However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and awkward collocations, such as 'addiction of drugs' (should be 'drug addiction') and 'excess use of mobile phones' (should be 'excessive use'). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on simple phrasing. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations and avoid repetitive structures.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but the accuracy is inconsistent. There are several grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow, such as 'can lack of sleep cause' (incorrect word order) and 'preventing using screens more often' (awkward phrasing). You also struggle with subject-verb agreement and preposition usage, for example, 'listen to music' should be 'listening to music' after 'such as.' While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors.

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