Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, sleep deprivation has become one of the major issues in most of the people. There are multiple factors which has contributed in this matter but the main factors in my opinion are the stress and excessive use of the electronic devices used by the people. This essay will discuss this problems and provide with possible solutions for the problem.

One on the main reason for the lack of sleep is the stress level in most of the human beings due to work and personal responsibilities. Nowadays, every one wants to achieve their dream, which leads them to work harder and extra hours to complete their work tasks. Moreover, the economy has worsened leading to increased prices of all the necessary goods. As a result, the provider of the family has to work more in order to fulfill their duties in the family. They work till late night to complete their given task giving up their precious sleep. On top of that if they are home early they stressed about their work and if they have some deadlines they worry about that, which resulted in lack of sleep.

One another factors which contribute to this situation is the excessive use of social media. Mobile phones has become an indispensable things in human lives. Due to this, most people have a habit of using while they are going to sleep thinking they will just use it for few minutes but they don’t know when they have spent to much time resulting them to have less time to complete their sleep. For instance, they think they will just watch one video before going to bed but they continue scrolling through multiple videos in their eagerness sacrificing their necessary sleep.

I believe there are numerous ways we can do to get a proper amount of sleep. Firstly, people should restrict their time to use social media’s on their phones or they can avoid it completely at the night to give their mind and body a proper rest. They can also use meditation and exercise to relax their body and mind which will assist them with proper sleep during the night.

At the last, Although there are various factors which has affected human lives a proper method and lifestyle can lead to complete the adequate sleep in persons life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the problems caused by lack of sleep and potential solutions. However, the analysis is somewhat unbalanced. While you identify stress and social media as causes, you do not explicitly detail the specific health or social problems that arise from sleep deprivation (e.g., cognitive decline, health issues, or workplace accidents). The solutions provided are relevant but could be more deeply developed. To reach a higher band, ensure that every part of the prompt is explored with equal depth and that your ideas are fully supported with clear examples or logical consequences.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'Moreover', 'On top of that', and 'Firstly', which help the flow of ideas. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or repetitive, such as starting paragraphs with 'One on the main reason' and 'One another factors'. Additionally, the concluding paragraph is quite brief and does not effectively summarise the main points of the essay. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring a more robust conclusion would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using words like 'indispensable', 'deprivation', and 'responsibilities'. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'one of the major issues in most of the people' (should be 'among most people') and 'the provider of the family' (should be 'breadwinners'). Some collocations are also slightly unnatural, such as 'complete their sleep'. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and refining your use of prepositions to ensure your writing sounds more natural and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('factors which has contributed', 'Mobile phones has become') and pluralisation errors ('social media’s', 'one another factors'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they are frequent enough to impact the overall fluency. To progress, pay closer attention to basic subject-verb agreement and ensure that your complex sentences are constructed accurately without missing articles or incorrect verb forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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