Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In this contemporary era, many people complain that they have difficulty getting enough sleep. Some people believe that it is true that people have difficulty getting enough sleep, while some people oppose this statement. People live in the contemporary era, where many changes have taken place. In this essay, I will further elaborate my views in favour of this statement with an appropriate example.

To commence with, there are ample reasons to support the aforementioned notion. The first and foremost reason is that people are busy with their work. They have a hectic work schedule and lots of responsibilities. To exemplify this further, People should do one thing in their spare time. They must spend time with family and help with household chores. Apart from the reasons mentioned above, it cannot be ignored that the main reason is a busy schedule.

The second striking reason behind this is that people have more responsibilities for their children's school. They are always doing hard work for their family. Moving further. It is pertinent to mention that lack of sleep causes many problems. People cannot do proper work. They feel less energy and cannot concentrate on their work. Categorically speaking, it cannot be ignored that the main problem is lack of sleep.

Nevertheless, there are also certain reasons why some people oppose this statement. Predominantly, many people think that doing more work earns more. For instance, it is good to earn more for your children and give more time to your family.

To recapitulate, it is a common belief that lack of sleep causes problems. I believe this people living in the contemporary era, so doing hard work pays more. They can live happily if they have enough money to survive.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response touches on both parts of the question, but it addresses them only minimally. It identifies reduced concentration, low energy and difficulty doing work as effects of insufficient sleep, and mentions a busy schedule as a possible cause. However, the task asks what problems lack of sleep can cause and what can be done about it; the essay gives almost no practical remedies. The discussion of earning more and providing for children does not clearly answer either part, and the opening introduces an opposing view that is not required. To improve, state a direct position and develop relevant effects and solutions, such as setting a regular bedtime or reducing late-night work, with a specific example for each.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The essay has separate paragraphs and uses signposting such as “To commence with,” “Moving further” and “To recapitulate,” so the reader can recognise an introduction, body and conclusion. However, ideas are not arranged in a clear progression: the first body paragraph discusses work demands but then shifts to spare time and household chores, while the next moves from children’s schooling to the effects of sleep loss. The paragraph beginning “Nevertheless” introduces an opposing view that does not support the task’s two questions. Repeated phrases such as “the main reason” and “it cannot be ignored” also make cohesion mechanical. Group each paragraph around one task point and connect examples directly to that point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the general topic, with relevant phrases such as “hectic work schedule,” “responsibilities,” “concentrate” and “lack of sleep.” There is also some attempt to use more formal language, including “aforementioned notion” and “pertinent to mention.” However, the range is limited by repetition of “contemporary era,” “people,” “work” and “main reason,” and some expressions are unnatural or imprecise, such as “feel less energy” and “doing hard work pays more.” These choices can make the intended meaning less clear. Aim for precise topic vocabulary and natural collocations, for example “feel fatigued,” “earn a higher income” and “impair concentration,” rather than relying on formulaic phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response uses mostly simple sentence patterns, with some attempts at longer structures, such as “People live in the contemporary era, where many changes have taken place.” Basic meaning is generally understandable, but the range is limited and errors recur. For example, “I believe this people living in the contemporary era” lacks a complete grammatical structure, and “Moving further.” is an incomplete sentence that should be joined to the following idea. In “They feel less energy,” the sentence pattern is also not formed correctly. Punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, as in “People” after “To exemplify this further.” Practise complete clauses, accurate sentence boundaries and a wider range of controlled complex sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.