Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In the future, more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on holiday. Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A substantial proportion of people will choose to visit and explore their own country rather than spending their holidays abroad.This essay will discuss both points along with my opinion.

I don't agree with this point because I believe that those people who can afford to travel abroad will prefer to spend their holidays in foreign countries. As it is the era of social media and the world is like a global village, many influencers and travellers explore places and people see them on social platforms which motivate them to visit those places personally. Apart from this, advances in technology and relative ease of travelling made it easy for people to travel from one country to another. Additionally, many people travel abroad for their religious activities and due to increasing population these numbers increase day by day . For instance, twenty million people visited for Hajj last year compared to thirty million this year which shows a rising trend.

On the other hand, some people still prefer to spend holidays in their own country due to multiple reasons; either they can't afford to travel abroad or their health is not accompanying them. Many people think that they should promote their own local tourism industry and should spend their wealth in their own countries.

In conclusion, many people prefer their own country for spending their holidays while other who can afford 6g

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear disagreement and provide relevant reasons, including social media’s influence, easier travel, religious journeys, and the cost or health barriers that lead some people to holiday locally. The Hajj comparison is a specific example, but its connection to holiday travel is not explained, and the claim that numbers rise because of population is asserted rather than developed. The response also promises to “discuss both points,” although the task asks whether you agree or disagree, and the conclusion is cut off at “other who can afford 6g,” leaving your final position and summary incomplete. The response is below the required 250 words. Develop the main reasons with clearer explanation and examples, and finish with a complete conclusion that directly answers the question.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, a paragraph supporting your disagreement, a contrasting paragraph about domestic tourism, and an attempted conclusion. Linking expressions such as “Apart from this,” “Additionally,” and “On the other hand” help signal relationships between ideas. However, the progression is not fully controlled: the first body paragraph moves quickly from social media to technology and then Hajj, without showing how each point supports the central argument. The contrast paragraph is brief, and the conclusion ends mid-sentence, so the response lacks a complete ending. Some connections are also mechanical, with several points simply added rather than developed. Group related reasons, explain their links, and use a complete final paragraph to restate your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonably varied set of topic-related vocabulary, including “social platforms,” “advances in technology,” “local tourism industry,” and “religious activities.” These choices make the main ideas understandable, and phrases such as “global village” show an attempt to use less basic language. However, some expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “their health is not accompanying them” and “visited for Hajj.” “Spend their wealth” is also less natural in this context than a phrase about spending money locally. The unfinished final phrase further limits the impression of control. Aim for accurate collocations and precise wording, especially when describing reasons and examples; this will make your vocabulary more flexible and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including a conditional idea (“those people who can afford to travel abroad”) and a reason clause beginning “because.” Most of the meaning remains understandable, but errors in sentence boundaries, agreement, articles, and punctuation recur. For example, there is no space after “abroad.” before “This essay”; “made it easy” should agree with the plural subject “advances”; and “other who can afford” needs a plural form and a completed clause. The sentence beginning “For instance” also needs clearer grammatical framing. These issues, together with the incomplete conclusion, prevent consistently accurate control. Practise checking subject–verb agreement, articles, and sentence endings, while keeping complex sentences manageable.

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