Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In the future, more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on holiday. Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In the future, more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country I am definitely agree with that. Because if some people want a go to abroad so they have to travel by plane so they can not aford because is very costly. So some people choose to go to their own country.\

Firstly, If people want to go their own country like Bramptan, ottawa, vancuver so the can easily travel by train or by bus,And they can save them time. Secondly, people are celebrate festivals with the family. And they can a spend a time with family because they already knows about them culture Ans as well as they know about them life styles, food. However, if some people choose to visit to abrod they can see the different type of culture they meet diffrent type of people As well as the can learn their language.

Furthermore, If people are going with their country they can enjoy with friends .

In conclusion, If the people are choose to go to own country in holidays, if very good for them so they can meet them family and the can enjoy festivals with their friends and families.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You give a clear overall preference for holidays in one’s own country and offer relevant reasons, including lower travel costs, easier transport, and spending time with family. The contrast with overseas travel—experiencing other cultures and learning languages—also shows some awareness of the opposing view. However, the response addresses the topic only partially: the reasons are mostly listed rather than explained or supported with specific examples, and the conclusion repeats earlier points. The response contains 184 words, so it is 66 words below the 250-word minimum; 15 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop each main reason with an explanation or example, and make your agreement more explicit and consistent.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some organisation: you begin with your position, use “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “Furthermore” to introduce points, and finish with a conclusion. These signals help the reader identify the broad structure. However, progression between ideas is limited, and several points are placed together without showing how they connect—for example, transport, saving time, festivals, and cultural familiarity appear in one paragraph. The contrast beginning “However” is not clearly linked to your main position, and repeated references to “people” and “they” can make the relationships between ideas unclear. Use separate paragraphs for distinct reasons and connect each point with a clear explanation, rather than relying mainly on sequencing words.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Your vocabulary is basic but relevant to the topic: you use words and phrases such as “travel by plane,” “costly,” “festivals,” “culture,” and “language.” These allow the reader to recognise your main ideas. However, the range is repetitive, and frequent spelling and word-choice errors sometimes strain understanding, including “aford,” “abrod,” “diffrent,” and “life styles.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “a spend a time” and “go to their own country.” Build a more accurate range of travel-related expressions and check spelling carefully. More precise phrases for affordability, domestic travel, and cultural experiences would help you explain your reasons clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple sentences and longer sentences with connectors such as “because,” “so,” and “However,” but control is limited. Frequent errors in sentence structure, verb forms, agreement, and articles can make parts difficult to follow. For example, “I am definitely agree” has an incorrect verb pattern, while “people are celebrate festivals” and “they already knows” show problems with verb forms and agreement. Several sentences are joined or punctuated unclearly, including the opening sentence and the long sentence beginning “Secondly.” Practise forming accurate simple sentences first, then combine related ideas using one clear subordinate clause. Check subject–verb agreement and verb patterns when proofreading.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.