Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given diagram demonstrate the process of sugar making from sugar cane . This process taking 7 steps for complete manufacturing .

Firstly , we grown a sugar cane which was time consuming process took around 12 to 18 months ,when it was completely ready we can cut it by using machine or over own hands

after harvesting we put it in to the crusher which crush it and made a juice .

furthermore , we used purifyer for purifying this juice and than put it into a container and started heating which evaportes the high kinetic energy molecules and this juice became syrup.

Than this syrup put in to a centrifuge , which was started spinning and separated the sugar crystals from syrup after that these crystals put into a container and started dying an cooling after that it became sugar.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the process as sugar production and report several key stages, including growing the cane for 12–18 months, harvesting, crushing, purifying, evaporation, centrifuging, and drying. The account also correctly notes that harvesting can be mechanical or manual and that centrifuging separates crystals from syrup. However, there is no clear overview of the process as a whole, and some details are inaccurate or unclear: the diagram shows a limestone filter, not simply a “purifyer,” and the final stage is drying and cooling, rather than “dying.” The explanation of evaporation adds an unsupported account of “high kinetic energy molecules.” The response is also below the required 150 words. Add a concise overview and describe each stage accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The stages are mostly presented in the correct sequence, and linking expressions such as “Firstly,” “after harvesting,” and “after that” help the reader follow the process. However, the response is written as one continuous paragraph, so the stages are not grouped into clear sections. Several transitions are repetitive, especially the repeated use of “after that” and “than,” and the long final sentence combines centrifuging, separation, drying, and the outcome without clear boundaries. Use a short introduction and overview, then organise the stages into one or two body paragraphs. More precise links such as “Next,” “Once the juice has been purified,” and “Finally” would make the progression clearer and less mechanical.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant process vocabulary, including “crusher,” “juice,” “syrup,” “centrifuge,” and “sugar crystals,” which allows the main stages to be understood. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate: “purifyer” is not the appropriate term for the limestone filter, “dying” changes the meaning of the final stage, and “made a juice” is an unnatural collocation. Spelling errors such as “evaportes” and “than” also reduce precision. Aim for accurate process terms and natural collocations, for example, “the cane is crushed to extract juice” and “the crystals are dried and cooled.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts to connect stages using clauses, as in “when it was completely ready” and “which was started spinning,” but sentence structures are often faulty and the range remains limited. Errors in tense and agreement occur throughout: “The given diagram demonstrate,” “This process taking,” and “we grown” do not form accurate sentences. Articles and sentence boundaries are also problematic, as in “we put it in to the crusher which crush it and made a juice.” The long final sentence is difficult to control and contains several clauses joined without clear punctuation. Practise consistent passive forms for process descriptions, such as “The cane is crushed” and “The juice is heated,” and check subject–verb agreement and sentence boundaries.

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