Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The diaghram illustrate the production process of making sugar from sugar cane.
Overall,it can be seen clearly the manufacturing process of sugar is consist of 7 stages from growing of sugar to drying and cooling of sugar.
It the beginning the sugar canes take 12-18 months for proper growing growing is the 1 step of production.After this the second process is involed in harvesting throu a machine or manually.Then the theird process is consist on crushing the sugar canes to make juice from them,with the help of a crushing machine.In the fourth part the sugar cane juice will be pass out on the purifying juice with the help of limestone filter.
Therefore,the stage five is consist of giving them heat for to evaporator in this stage juice becomes syrup.Then the 6 stage is invole in the separation of crystals from syrup they called it centrifuge.In the last 7 stage the sugar will be stored for drying and colling which is the most important stage of the production of sugar.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You cover the main sequence and include several accurate details: the cane grows for 12–18 months, harvesting can be mechanical or manual, and the process ends with drying and cooling. The overview also identifies seven stages, giving the reader a useful summary of the process. Some stages, however, are less fully or clearly described. For example, the crushing stage produces juice, and the centrifuge separates sugar crystals from syrup; these details could be stated more precisely. The final stage is described as sugar being “stored,” which is not shown in the diagram. Focus on reporting what each stage does, and avoid adding unsupported details such as storage or calling a stage “the most important.”
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction and overview are followed by the stages in sequence, with the later stages placed in a separate paragraph. Sequencing phrases such as “In the beginning,” “After this,” and “In the last 7 stage” help show progression. However, some linking is mechanical, and the long middle paragraph packs several stages together, making the process harder to follow. The transition “Therefore” does not express a clear cause-and-effect relationship here. Use clearer paragraphing to group the early and later stages, and connect each stage with concise, accurate transitions. Check punctuation and spacing after commas and full stops so the sequence is easier to read.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use relevant process vocabulary, including “harvesting,” “crushing,” “limestone filter,” “syrup,” and “centrifuge,” which allows you to describe the diagram. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “diaghram,” “involed,” “throu,” “theird,” and “colling.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise: “proper growing,” “pass out on the purifying juice,” and “stored for drying” do not clearly describe the stages. Aim for accurate process collocations and use the diagram’s terms where possible, such as “the juice is purified through a limestone filter” and “the sugar crystals are separated from the syrup.” This would make your meaning more precise and fluent.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, and the overall meaning is generally understandable. However, errors in sentence structure, verb forms, agreement, and articles occur across the response. For example, “the manufacturing process of sugar is consist of 7 stages” should be “the manufacturing process consists of seven stages,” while “the sugar cane juice will be pass out” needs a correct passive form, such as “the juice is passed through a filter.” The opening also needs subject–verb agreement: “The diagram illustrates.” Several sentences run together without appropriate punctuation, and “It the beginning” is missing a verb. Practise accurate present-simple descriptions and passive constructions, which are especially useful for explaining processes.
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