Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The diagram illustrates the various stages involved the production of sugar from sugar cane.

Overall, this process begins with the growing of sugar cane and ends with the drying and cooling of sugar.

Starting with the initial stages, the growing of sugar cane for 12 to 18 months nicely and after the sugar cane grown nicely it can seen there the cutting or harvesting of sugar cane will be done the harvesting can be done through both method first with the machine of harvesting or cut through hands after this. in third step it can be seen the crushing of sugar is done in machine which produce juice of sugar cane.

lets move further in which the purifying of juice will be done in filter and after that the machine name evaporator in which the juice will be loaded and it start boiling juice and then the centrifuge will be done in which the sugar crystle will seprated and final step the drying and cooling will be done. here the process will com

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers the main stages of the sugar production process, from the growth of sugar cane to the final drying and cooling. However, the overview is somewhat simplistic, and the description of the process lacks the necessary precision for a higher band. While the key steps are identified, the explanation of the machinery and the transformation of the product is often vague (e.g., 'the machine name evaporator'). The response would benefit from a more formal tone and a clearer summary of the key features, such as the transition from raw material to refined product, rather than just listing steps in a narrative fashion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is organised in a chronological sequence, which is appropriate for a process description. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes awkward, such as 'lets move further in which' and 'after this. in third step'. Paragraphing is virtually non-existent, as the text is presented as a single block, which hinders the logical flow. To improve, you should use a wider range of linking words and ensure that each stage of the process is clearly demarcated with appropriate transitions, rather than relying on repetitive phrasing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'done', 'machine', and 'growing'. There are also several spelling errors, such as 'crystle' (crystals) and 'seprated' (separated), and word choice issues, such as 'the machine name evaporator'. To achieve a higher score, you need to use more precise technical vocabulary related to industrial processes, such as 'harvested', 'crushed', 'purified', 'evaporated', and 'crystallised'. Expanding your range of verbs and nouns will help you describe the process with greater accuracy and sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. There are issues with sentence structure, such as run-on sentences and fragments (e.g., 'after the sugar cane grown nicely it can seen there the cutting...'). Subject-verb agreement and article usage are also inconsistent. The range of structures is limited, consisting mostly of simple or poorly constructed complex sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring that each sentence has a clear subject and verb, and practice using passive voice, which is essential for describing processes.

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