Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The workflow illustrates the mechanism of producing sugar from sugar cane by going through different steps.

Overall, there are seven different steps to make sugar from the sugar cane, the steps involved is growing, harvesting using farmer or machine, crushing, purifying, boiling, separating and cooling.

First step of manufacturing sugar is to grow sugarcane in the soil, it takes 12 to 18 months to grow. After it, farmer or heavy machinery used to harvest the sugar cane from the soil and move it to the crushing machine, here the machine extract all the juice from every single sugar cane and then juice will move to the purification center for the limestone filtration.

After the juice extraction, it moves to the boiling process where it becomes syrup by evaporating majority of vapors, then it moves to the centrifugal procedure to separate crystals from the boiled syrup, then it move to the drying and cooling machines to make it ready to eat.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have successfully identified the main stages of the sugar production process. You provided a clear overview and followed the chronological order of the diagram. However, to reach a higher band, you should focus on highlighting the most significant features or comparisons rather than just listing every step. For example, you could have grouped the stages into 'preparation', 'processing', and 'refining' to show a more analytical approach. The description is accurate, but it lacks a slightly more sophisticated summary of the transformation from raw material to the final product.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The response is logically organized, moving step-by-step through the process. You use basic cohesive devices like 'First', 'After it', and 'then' to guide the reader. However, the paragraphing is quite limited; the entire body of the response is essentially one long paragraph. To improve, you should use paragraph breaks to separate the initial growth/harvesting stages from the industrial processing stages. Additionally, some transitions feel repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'then it moves to', which makes the flow feel slightly mechanical rather than fluid.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe the process, using terms like 'purification', 'filtration', 'evaporating', and 'centrifugal'. While these are accurate, the range is somewhat limited. There are some minor errors in word choice, such as 'mechanism' to describe a process, and 'farmer or heavy machinery used' which lacks the correct verb form. To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations related to industrial manufacturing and avoid repeating simple verbs like 'move' or 'make'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'the steps involved is' (should be 'are'), 'farmer or heavy machinery used' (missing auxiliary verb 'are'), and 'machine extract' (should be 'extracts'). Punctuation is also an area for improvement, as some sentences are run-on or comma-spliced. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the process, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency and accuracy of your writing.

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