Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
How sugar is produced from sugar cane
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The diagram illustrates the information on using sugar cane to make sugar. Overall, it is evident that process is complex and contains a large number of steps.
To commence with, firstly growing of sugar canes occur. It will take a time 12 to 18 months. Then harvesting takes place. Moreover, it can be done by both hands and a machine. After harvesting sugar cane taken away for crushing. In crushing, sugar canes put into a crusher which then pour out the juice of sugar canes.
Then, the juice poured out from the crusher is purified. A limestone filter is used for purifying. Then the juice is taken to an evaporator. High temperature in an evaporator converts juice into a syrup. Furthermore, syrup is then taken to the centrifuge which separates sugar crystals from the syrup. Drying and cooling is the last process in this sugar is dried and cooled in a large tank.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response covers the main stages of the sugar production process, from growing to the final cooling stage. However, the overview is quite basic and lacks a clear summary of the key features, such as the transition from raw material to refined product. While the main steps are identified, the description of the process is somewhat mechanical and lacks the analytical depth required for a higher band. For example, the mention of 'both hands and a machine' is a bit informal. To improve, ensure the overview highlights the most significant aspects of the process rather than just stating it is complex.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The response is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the sequence of events. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive and mechanical, relying heavily on 'Then' and 'Moreover'. The progression of ideas is logical, but the transitions between sentences could be smoother to create a more cohesive flow. For instance, the transition between the harvesting and crushing stages is abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that referencing is clear throughout the text would help elevate the coherence and cohesion score.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety expected at higher levels. Phrases like 'pour out the juice' and 'taken away' are somewhat simplistic. There is an attempt to use technical terms such as 'evaporator', 'centrifuge', and 'purified', which is positive. However, the range is limited, and there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to industrial processes, such as 'extraction', 'refinement', and 'subsequent'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'growing of sugar canes occur' (should be 'occurs'), 'take a time 12 to 18 months' (should be 'take 12 to 18 months'), and 'sugar cane taken away' (missing auxiliary verb 'is'). These errors do not generally impede communication, but they are frequent enough to affect the overall accuracy. Increasing the variety of complex sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement will help improve the grammatical range and accuracy.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.