Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

How sugar is produced from sugar cane

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The graph illustrates how sugar is produces from sugar cane through a series of process.

In general, the production of sugar requires 7 steps in total.

First step is cultivating sugar cane, It will take 12 to 18 months to mature. After that, famers will harvest them. They have two harvesting methods: using a harvester or harvesting manually. Once the sugar cane are collected, people are going to use machine to crush them into juice. They will use a limestone filter to further purify the juice to remove residue. After that is the most important step, people will pure the purified juice into a big jar, heating them to let excessive water to evaporate, It turns fruit juice into syrup. To get better tastes and texture of sugar, they will use a centrifuge to separate sugar crystals from syrup. These sugar crystals will be collected for drying and cooling. After experiencing above process, a can of sugar is produced.

Overall, sugar production technology is already very mature.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers the main stages of the sugar production process, from cultivation to the final product. However, the description is somewhat narrative rather than analytical. While you identify the key steps, the report lacks a clear overview of the process as a whole, and the final sentence ('a can of sugar is produced') is factually inaccurate based on the diagram, which shows sugar being packaged into bags. To improve, ensure you provide a clear summary of the process flow in the introduction and avoid adding personal commentary or inaccurate details. The response is sufficient in length, but the focus should remain strictly on reporting the visual information provided.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the sequence of events. You use some cohesive devices such as 'First step', 'After that', and 'Once', which provide a basic structure. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by awkward phrasing and punctuation errors, such as the comma splice in 'First step is cultivating sugar cane, It will take...'. To reach a higher band, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that your sentences are connected more smoothly, avoiding repetitive sentence structures and ensuring that punctuation is used correctly to separate independent clauses.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to describe the process clearly. You use some relevant technical terms such as 'cultivating', 'purify', 'residue', and 'centrifuge'. However, there are some word choice errors, such as 'pure' instead of 'pour' and 'fruit juice' instead of 'sugar cane juice'. Additionally, the phrasing 'a can of sugar' is imprecise. To improve, focus on using more precise terminology related to industrial processes and ensure that your word choices are contextually accurate. Expanding your range of synonyms for process-related verbs would also be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('sugar is produces', 'sugar cane are collected') and punctuation errors, such as comma splices and incorrect capitalization after commas. These errors occur frequently but do not completely impede communication. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensure that you are not joining independent clauses with only a comma. Increasing your use of passive voice, which is appropriate for describing industrial processes, would also enhance your grammatical range.

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